How Angus Black Stole Christmas!
by kade32
Summary: BASED on the 2000 film, Dr. Seuss's How the Grinch Stole Christmas. When a miserly, Christmas-hating curmudgeon named Angus Black has reached his breaking point at the Toons of Toonville, he plots to steal Christmas from them. Meanwhile, a young Jack Frost is attempting to find the true meaning of Christmas as he believes there is no more Christmas spirit among his hometown.
1. The Toons of Toonville

**CAST:  
** **Angus Black (OC) as the Grinch  
** **Jack Frost as Cindy Lou Who  
** **Hans Westergaard as Mayor Augustus May Who  
** **Jessica Rabbit as Martha May Whovier  
** **Ishmael Overland (OC) as Lou Lou Who  
** **Yves Overland (OC) as Betty Lou Who  
** **Duke of Wesleton as Whobris  
** **Slash (OC) as Max the Dog  
** **Escobar "Esler" and Ewing Overland (OC) as Drew and Stu Lou Who  
** **Flora, Fauna and Merryweather as the Grinch's caretakers  
** **Chief Seris (OC) as Chief Wholihan**

* * *

It was snowing beautifully on a cold, wintry, December night. The breeze blows through a blizzard as it falls. One snowflake comes up and inside of it, there is a vast variety of clouds and crystalized formations.

 _NARRATOR: Inside a snowflake_  
 _like the one on your sleeve,_  
 _there happened a story_  
 _you must see to believe._

Going past the large clouds, there is a large, snowy, mountainous region. There was one mountain that was practically bigger than the rest and below that mountain laid a small town.

 _Way up in the mountains,  
_ _in the high range of Marsoons  
_ _lay the small town of Toonville,  
_ _the home of the Toons._

 ** _Dr. Seuss's How Angus Black Stole Christmas!_**

It was Christmas in the town of Toonville and each and every one of the townsfolk was absolutely thrilled of the holiday season. The people were as busy as they always are each year on the holidays. Shopping, decorating, setting up their tree and all that. Toonville was so-called because everyone was a quite lively and had an energetic sense of hope and joy, in which a citizen of Toonville was called a "Toon". In this small town, nothing can be denied that Christmas was the most amazing time of year for the good people. As of now, most of the townsfolk were carried a large stack of presents in their arms, leading marching bands, putting up Christmas lights and decorations and so forth.

 _Ask any Toon,  
_ _and they'll have this to say,  
_ _"There is no place like Toonville  
_ _around Christmas Day."_

 _Every window was flocked,  
_ _every lamppost was dressed,  
_ _and the Toonville band marched  
_ _in their Christmasy best._

The marching band marched through the streets, performing their Christmas pride and musical tune. They had passed a few passing citizens, some wishing them a Merry Christmas. A tuba player, as he was playing his tuba, a smaller version of himself crawled out of the tuba playing a high-pitched tone. The tuba player got annoyed and ended up sucking the smaller one it.

 _Labor Day was fine  
_ _and Easter was pleasant,  
_ _and every St. Patrick's Day,  
_ _they ate every green pheasant.  
_

 _But every Toon knew  
_ _from their toes to their snout,  
_ _they loved Christmas the most  
_ _without a single Toon doubt._

At a local shopping market, the place was completely crowded with customers doing their Christmas shopping. And by that, that means that store is the busiest of all. A man at the cash register was cashing people's products one by one.

"Schlesinger's welcomes you!" The cashier told a customer as she paid for her things, while other desperate customers were waiting for their turn.

"Merry Christmas!" He said and pressed the buttons on his cash register. "Thank you for shopping at Schlesinger's."

Somewhere in the store, in the middle of the crowing crowd of shoppers, Ishmael Overland, was looking over a long list of things to get.

"We got a trombone for your brother Esler and a saxophone for your brother Ewing," Ishmael said reading through the list. "A telescope for your uncle, a hat for your aunt and a CD for your cousin, Leo. So we just need-Jack?" He looked around for someone to notice he's missing. "Jack Overland? Oh." He saw a boy was a huge stack of large gifts in his arms. Ishmael carefully pushed his way through to reach him. "Jack Overland, son?" He removed the present from the middle to reveal a young 10-year old, brown-haired boy named Jack, Ishmael's youngest son.

"Dad?" Jack asked.

"Yeah?" His father said.

"Doesn't this seem like a bit much?" Jack asked.

"This is what Christmas is all about." Ishmael told him. "Don't you feel it?"

Jack used be excited about Christmas when he was younger, but nowadays, he honestly wasn't so sure anymore. Back at the cash register, the shoppers were becoming too much to handle, almost starting to form a riot.

"Merry Christmas!" The cashier said, almost starting to run out of breath from serving the large amount of customers. "Wait! Don't forget your change!"

Outside, near the town center, on a clocktower that showed how much time was left before Christmas, the clock changed to _3 Days, 27 Hours and 33 Minutes_.

"Another minute closer to Christmas!" The man on the tower shouted to the townspeople. The clock bell tones, catching the people's attention.

"And, for the next five minutes, only 99% off!" A crooked salesman shouted to the folks and with that, the whole crowd rushed to him.

In the middle of the Toonville town center, a large Christmas tree stood in place, beautifully decorated to perfection. The only thing left was the tree topper. A man was lifted up to the very top with a large star in his hands and once he reached the top, he places the star right on the tip, lightning up and finishing the tree.

 _Yes. Every Toon down in Toonville  
_ _liked Christmas a lot.  
_ _But a man named Angus Black,  
_ _who lived just north of Toonville,_ _did not._

On the large mountain above the town known as Mt. Everwiffer, from inside the darkness of a mountain cave, long, pale, talon-like fingers grabbed hold of the handles of a device which was used to see trespassers. Through an eye piece that shot out of the snow in the high mountain, a group of four teenagers; Jack's older brothers, Esler and Ewing, and their girlfriends, Lola and Maxie were rushing up the mountain.

"Get on it, girls!" Esler shouted as they hiked up the mountain. "All the good mistletoe's at the top!"

"Hey, Esler!" His brother, Ewing, shouted with glee. "I'll race you!"

"Not if I race you first!" Esler shouted back. "Last one on the top is a stinky old Black!"

They all stopped when the girls did. "Guys, where are we? Maybe we should go back." Lola said logically.

"What?" The brothers chuckled.

"You're scared of Black!" Ewing said tauntingly.

"No!" Lola shook her head in denial, even though she actually was, but refused to show it. Chuckling at her mousiness, Esler hopped down to mock her by going over the story of said person.

"They say he lives up here in a big cave and he only comes down when he's hungry for the taste of...HUMAN FLESH!" Esler said teasingly and shouted the last part, scaring Lola.

"Oh, Esler!" Lola whacked him and the boys ran up the pile of rocks with the girls catching up.

"You're scared of Black! You're scared of Black!" The boy called out, mocking the girls.

From inside the cave, an alarm went off, signaling the approach of an intruder and the teen's voices were heard of a speaker, alerting whoever lived inside of the cave of the delinquent youths' unexpected and uninvited presence. Outside, the teens got further up and suddenly froze in their tracks and their lively faces of mischief turned into that of pure terror. The brothers stood quivering with fear, eyes widened, lips parted as the gazed upon the tell-tale door that lead to the forbidden home of he who despises the joyful holiday of Christmas, Angus Black. Esler and Ewing were beginning to have second thoughts about this and had the right mind to just turn around right now and leave without a glance back, but being the tough older brothers, they bravely, though reluctantly, decided to proceed with this impulsive act.

Lola urged the two anxiously, hiding her fear being a mask, "Well, go on! Touch it! Touch the door!" She gave Ewing a small flirty smile as if to bride him further. "Do it for me, Ewing."

He nodded to her while still shivering along with his brother from both the cold and from the frightful thought of disturbing the most feared man ever to exist in their time. Ever so slowly, the brothers tip-toed closer to the door. Baby steps and whimpers, the two got even closer as the girls watched them with baited breath, hiding behind the edge of the small cliff, preparing for anything. Finally, Esler and Ewing got close enough and Esler hesitantly reach out a shaking hand to grab the knob and was inches away from opening the door. However, before he could even get near the knob, the door immediately flung itself open and the teens were met with a menacingly animalistic growl and came face to face with red glowing eyes in the darkness along with the sharp teeth of a monster as it roared and start for them.

The brothers screamed at the top of their lungs, colors drained from their numb faces and jumped back as they ran for their lives, diving off the cliff as the girls watched in horror. Esler and Ewing ran so fast that they started to roll down the slippery, snowy hill with Lola and Maxie tumbling down close behind them as they shrieked. The monster, on the other hand, was merely a mechanical decoy designed by Angus Black and his dog, Slash, was controlling it and barking into a tube in the back, making his barks come out as deep-pitched snarls to make the decoy more believable.

"Well done, Slash!" Called out the voice of the man known simply as Angus Black from inside the cave.

This man was infamous for hating the cheerful, ever-so-loved holiday of Christmas, in stark contrast to the Toons of Toonville. Long ago when he was about a youth, he ran away from Toonville to fend for himself in the icy wilderness and eventually made his habitat inside the cave on the top of Mt. Everwiffer. He goes by names, such as "He Who Does Not Like Christmas" or "The Man in the Snow". The latter, because he had spend his entire life in the bitter cold inside a cave in only a tattered pair of black pants. Rumors insisted that he was immune to the cold and lived off a diet of disgusting foods and vegetables and even some indigestible items like glasses, etc. From within the darkness of his cavernous home, Angus damaged through his pile of smelly vegetables and rotten fruits while grumbling to himself about the Toons.

"Serves them right, those Yuletide-loving, sickly sweet, nog-sucking cheer mongers!"

He grabbed a measly onion and held it close to his mouth.

"I really don't like them. Mm-mm. No I don't." He said to himself as he took a bite out of the foul-smelling vegetable, revealing his rows of dangerously sharp, yellow molars. "SLASH!"

The dog in question whimpered once his master shouted his name.

"Get my cloak!" ordered Angus as he made his way out the open door. "I've been much to tolerant for these juvenile delinquents and their innocent, victimless pranks."

Angus viewed the town from above as he rubbed the onion on his underarms as a sort of deodorant before tossing it away.

"So they want to get to know me do they?" He asked to no one in particular. "They want to spend a little quality time with Mr. Black?"

Whipping his head around, he is shown with alabaster white skin, paler than a ghost, with some veins revealed on some parts of his body as well as some access frost and ice, barely visible. He was also somewhat skinny with his ribcage and other bones showing, but still remained strong. His jet black, messy hair dancing on the whistling wind.

"I guess I could you a little social interaction." He decided before a wicked, twisted cartoon of a smile form on his light blue frozen lips with devious thoughts on his mind.

* * *

 **Happy December! Here's the first chapter to my fanmake story, everyone. I hope you guys like it.**


	2. Anti-Yuletide Turmoil

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the rights to How the Grinch Stole Christmas! like Dr. Seuss does nor the rights to the Jim Carrey film adaptation. I really loved that movie. Brings out the Christmasness during the holidays. What do you guys think?**

* * *

Everyone down in Toonville was doing about their daily Christmas shopping and other business as well. Everyone carried their wrapped-up gifts and shopping bags and who knows what else. Suddenly, Angus, donned with a black, raggedy cloak and an outlandish, grinning mask to hide his facial features from the public, tip-toed through the snow-covered streets with Slash by his side, devious and mischievous ideas circling his mind. If those Toons were going to prank him this year, then maybe he should prank them back and that's just what he'll do. He stopped when three Toons rode past him on a three-seated bicycle carrying Christmas gifts who flashed him a smile and a wave. Angus could only glare at them with pure hatred behind his mask, which, thankfully, they didn't see.

"Merry Christmas!" They called out.

"Oh, yeah! You bet! Ho, ho, ho and stuff." called back Angus sarcastically as he watched them ride away. Suddenly, their bicycle split into three from a recent prank Anus pulled in the middle of the street, disrupting the traffic and the crowd.

"Oh my! Someone has vandalized that vehicle!" Angus gasped in mock shock and looked down at this dog who whined. "You see, Slash? The city is a dangerous place."

 _NARRATOR: Angus hated Christmas,_  
 _The whole Christmas season._  
 _Now, please, don't ask why._  
 _Nobody quite knows the reason._

Angus maneuvered through the town acting as casually as he could be, carrying a large saw behind him which he had used on the bicycle earlier. A traffic officer walked by him and waved at him with a nodding smile.

"Top of the day." The officer said.

"Flatfoot." Angus waved back before he stopped in front of two young children and handed them the saw to get rid of the evidence.

"Hey, kids! Here's a present for you!" He shouted when the kids took the sharp tool and took off with him shouting them on. "Make sure to run real faster than that! Let's go! Double time! Move, move, move, move, move!"

He grinned to himself. Another prank well done, he thought to himself triumphantly.

 _It could be perhaps  
_ _that his shoe were too tight.  
Or it could be perhaps __that his head  
_ _wasn't screwed on just right._

On he went to create more mischief, Angus skated across the road by holding onto the bumper to a car as it drove. He legs go after it came to a stop and walked his way through the crowded streets of Christmas-loving Toons, making him boil inside with anger and annoyance.

"Merry Christmas!" cried a pedestrian.

"Idjit." grumbled Angus.

 _But I think that the_  
 _most likely reason of all  
may had been that his heart  
was two sizes too small_

The Yuletide-loathing troublemaker elbowed a passing Toon carrying an armful of presents, knocking him down to the ground with the gifts falling onto the snow-covered pavement. Angus was suddenly stopped by the crooked salesman who held his candy cane-colored cane in front of him who was looking for a good sale.

"Hey, stranger! Won't let you go until you buy a chapeau!" He grinned.

Granted, he wasn't in the mood to deal with these idiots to the annoyed Angus grabbed the salesman by the shirt and brought him close to his face. Angus took a deep exhale right in his face, forcing him to inhale the toxic, foul-smelling, insufferable stench of his halitosis. He has never brushed his teeth in decades or at least taken a mint. Angus lets him go as the salesman's body became weak from his breath and he wanted away chuckling as the salesman fainted forward on the ground. Some Toons on a bicycle rode over his unconscious body.

As this went on, everything still went on as usual. _Green Christmas by Barenaked Ladies_ played over some speakers. Jack was walking with his father over to the post office where he worked with Ishmael carrying the purchased merchandise on his arms with a grin on his face, but his son's face displayed no happiness of any kind.

"Oh, boy. Nothing beats Christmas, am I right?" He chuckled, asking his son.

Jack only shrugged and replied, "I guess."

His father looked at him strangely at his dry answer. "You guess?"

"Well, it's just that I look at you and Mom and everyone getting all anxious and worked up. Doesn't this seem...a bit too much?"

Ishmael was caught off guard by Jack's lack of enthusiasm. He used be really excited and happy come the Christmas season. But before he could so much as open his mouth to respond back...

"DAD! DAD!"

They looked to see Esler and Ewing rush through the crowd towards them, covered from head to toe in ice and snow, shivering from fear and the cold from their encounter on Mt. Everwiffer. Their father looked at them with surprise.

"What happened to you?" demanded Ishmael.

"It was...Angus Black!" Esler shouted.

All of the sudden, as soon as the familiar person's name was called out loud, the business among the Toons through the toon halted as every gasped with fright, car tires squeaked to a stop, causing hysteria in the road and even the music over the speakers cut off abruptly. The Toons panicked and stopped in their tracks as soon as they all heard Angus's name.

"Angus Black?!" Some Toons screamed, trembling.

The perpetrator in question stood by them and asked, "What do you want?! I mean..." But then he remembered he was supposed to keep a low profile and said with a high-pitched voice, "Black?! Oh no!"

That's when a man with reddish-brown hair and sideburns walked out of a store upon hearing that dreadful name. It was the mayor of Toonville, Hans Westergaard.

"Did I hear someone say "Angus Black"?" asked Hans.

Ishmael forced a nervous smile as he gazed upon the political leader of the town, hoping that his two older sons won't get him in trouble.

"Hello, Mayor Hans, sir." He greeted.

"Uh, Ishmael?" Hans gestured the man to man and Ishmael came to him nervously. Hans spoke quietly to him, "I'd hate to have to remind you all that this Christmas marks 1,000th Toonbilation."

"Toonville's most important celebration!" Hans's aide, the Duke of Wesleton, brought in.

"And the Book of Toon says very clearly..." The Mayor gestured the Duke to hand him a large, thick book with the words "The Book of Toon" embedded on the cover. He reads, ""Every size of Toon we can measure knows that Toonbilation is a time we must treasure". Now, Ishmael, please tell me that you're not out on Mt. Everwiffer provoking the one person within a billion miles from here who hates Christmas."

"But it was Black!" chimed Esler and Ewing in protest, causing the citizens to panic once more. Ishmael rushed over and covered their mouths before they could say anything else.

"No, no, sir, the boys didn't see anyone named Black." chuckled Ishmael nervously. He turned, removing his hands, making the two rave on again before he covered their mouths again. "They were probably just up on the mountain playing with matches or defacing public property, you know, teenage stuff. You know how it is."

This made Hans sigh with relief and he said, "Well, that's a relief."

"Alright! You heard the man! There's no Angus Black problem here!"

Everyone also breathed a heavy sigh of relief and went about their business as if nothing happened. Suddenly, Angus shot a spitball from afar that hit Hans in the cheek, making him yelp and press a hand to his cheek. Angus chuckled and scurried along. Minutes later at the local post office, things were getting crazy as usual.

"Ishmael, I need this here by tomorrow."

"Heck of a rush." said Ishmael, stamping a present handed to him by a Toon before he tossed it behind him into the hands of his co-worker. He did the same with another present and another and another and so on. Jack stood in the back were the letters were kept as it was bring-your-kid-to-work day. Ishmael skidded passed his boy on a rolling ladder.

"I just don't understand something, Dad. I mean, why won't anyone talk about Black? Is he really that dangerous?" asked Jack, still curious about the Man in the Snow himself.

"You kids and Black." His father replied, tossing some gifts onto a conveyor belt. "It's quite complicated, Jack, you see, Angus is a Toon who always...well, actually he's someone you'd necessarily call a Toon, because Toons are mostly happy. Not like him. No, he's just a hateful, sociopathic maniac who just doesn't like Christmas. Never celebrates it, never wants anything to do with it. Just take a look at his mailbox. Not a single Christmas card ever since. Not in or out."

Jack observed the mailbox that read Angus's name with was filled with nothing but spiderwebs and dust. There hasn't been any mail for Angus in many years, so no one even bothered to clean it to send anything to him. Jack's mind went on in confusion as he turned to face Ishmael.

"But how come?" The boy asked.

Ishmael struggled to respond. Angus was a difficult subject to press on. But his mind was interrupted by the mob of consumers by the counter, chattering incoherently out loud and holding their gifts. Ishmael quickly sprung back to work, pushing his ladder to the other side.

"I'll be right there." He told the customers. "Alright, we'll straighten this out."

* * *

 **And there's the next chapter! Thanks for your undivided support. I enjoy writing this and hope you guys have a happy Christmas.**


	3. Encounter at the Post Office

Meanwhile, in the sorting room of the post office, the chuckling of Angus was heard as he was causing more mischief with the Toons' mail. He had taken his mask off and put his hood down as there was no one about to see him doing his fiendish work.

"It'll take them years to sort this out." He called evilly as he re-arranged envelopes, packages, etc. "This is his, now it's yours. This is her's, now it's his."

Then Angus scampered about a couple feet in front of the slots with letters in his hands.

"And for the rest of you..." He then tossed the letters into various slots while crying, "Jury duty! Jury duty! Jury duty! Blackmail! Pink slip! Chain letter! Eviction notice! Jury duty!..."

More letters were thrown into the wrong slots quicker as Angus picked up the pace, emitting a light giggle of amusement.

* * *

Ishmael handed Jack some letters while the crowd still remained.

"Jack, would you mind helping me take these to the back room, son?" He requested. "And watch out for the sorting machine. You don't wanna get caught in there."

"Okay, Dad." nodded Jack.

Once inside of the back room where an alarm blared, Jack entered the room where some presents were being rolled on a conveyor belt to be dropped into a hole in the ground with other presents piled up to be taken to the sorting machine below. Jack looked around the room, seeing the occasional stacks of gifts as well as the mail slots where Angus was. He didn't know why, but he started to feel uneasy and unnerved like he somehow felt the presence of someone hiding. Then he heard something drop to the floor behind him and he gasped and turned to see Angus's mask on the floor. He curiously picked it up and looked at it. Right above him, Angus held onto the walls in a corner, holding Slash, as he silently prayed Jack wouldn't suspect anything. Luckily, Jack just shrugged, making Angus sigh in relief. But then the thick silence was broken by Slash's sneezing.

"Gesundheit." whispered Angus, before his eyes widened.

Jack heard this and spun around, seeing Angus before he shriek in terror and jumped back, arm up preparing to defend himself. Angus screamed as well, mocking the poor child. He jumped down from his hiding spot onto the floor and stared Jack down with his best menacing, intimidating glare. The brown-haired boy stood stiff like a statue as he was standing face-to-face with _him_. The Man in the Snow. He Who Does Not Like Christmas.

"You're...you're...you're..." Jack stammered in his words, fear lacing his voice.

"You're, you're, you're... _ANGUS BLACK_!" Angus mocked before he growled into Jack's face, making him jump backwards again. This time, he fell into the pile of presents leading to the sorting machine. He squirmed, trying to get himself free, but with no luck.

"Help me! Someone please help!"

Angus looked surprised. He expected the boy to ran away in horror, but not this. Not that he cared.

"Well, that worked out nicely." He commented with a smirk.

Jack's cries of distress were unheard when he plummeted deeper to a room of steaming and loud machinery where gifts were put on another conveyor belt to be stamped with a larger stamper. One present was stamped "Fragile". Jack continued to scream and try to wiggle his way out.

"Come on, Slash. Let's go." Angus ordered his dog. "Our work here is finished."

But then he was bitten on the behind by Slash, who wasn't going to let his ill-tempered master just let a young child die or get injured.

"That is not a chew toy!" snarled Angus as he spoke his body, tried to get Slash off of him. "Stop it, Slash! Get that out of your mouth! You have no idea where it's been!"

Jack was getting further down in the hole and closer to his fate. He could almost see the factory machinery that could possibly injure him if he doesn't get out of there soon. Steam whistles were blown and Angus had a choice to make. But he needed to choose quickly or else. He couldn't just walk out of there and leave Jack in there. Someone was going to walk in soon and see the commotion going on. Hearing Jack's frightened screams, it seemed he had no other choice. Reluctantly and angrily forcing back every chance he had to just escape right now, he growled to himself, annoyed that he has to do the right thing.

"Bleeding hearts in the world unite!" He complained and went over to the pile, reached in until he grabbed Jack's ankle and pulled him right out, placing him onto his feet on the floor.

"There!" He growled, gritting his teeth, and grabbed his mask back from Jack. "Give me that! Don't you know you're not supposed to take things that don't belong to you?! What's the matter with you?! You some kind of _WILD ANIMAL?! HUH?!_ "

Jack shook his head vigorously as he shouted.

"Let's go." Angus told Slash and headed for the exiting double doors.

"Thanks for saving me, sir." Jack thanked him.

But Angus immediately froze in his track once he made it to the double doors. He furiously dragged his fingers down on the glass, making loud squeaks, as he turned around to glare at Jack.

"Saving you? Is that what you think I was doing?" He asked, not believing his own ears.

"Well, yeah." answered Jack.

Angus only wagged his finger and said, "Wrong-o."

He grabbed some red wrapping pair nearby and advance close to Jack slowly intimidatingly.

"I can't help but notice that you are improperly packaged, young man." He grinned evilly and before Jack could even blink, Angus started wrapping Jack up in a rushed fashion. "Hold still! Slash, pick out a bow!"

Slash barked in response as Angus resumed wrapping Jack before stopping, "Can I use your finger for a second?" and he finished wrapping him up in a large box and placing him on the conveyor belt for someone to find him. Angus finally left through the double doors and snapped the mask back in place.

"Ow." He said and disappeared with Slash.

Ishmael entered the room, wondering what was keeping his son.

"Jack? Are you here?" He called.

"Dad!" answered back Jack's voice on underneath the red wrapping as he tried to free himself. "Dad, is that you? Help me out of this!"

"What on earth?" Ishmael rushed to his son's aid and helped get the wrapping off of him. Once the paper was finally off, Jack looked surprised and scared out of his wits.

"Thank you, Dad. You will not believe what I've just been through." Jack explained.

"You've been practicing you're Christmas wrapping? Oh, son, I'm so proud of you!"

Jack froze in his words when his father got the wrong idea. He was about to tell him about his encounter with Angus, but after Ishmael thought he did something else, Jack thought against it and nodded in agreement. What would his father say if he was wrapped up like a present by He Who Does Not Like Christmas?

 _NARRATOR: Innocent young Jack_  
 _didn't know what to do.  
In his head, bum-tumbled  
a conflict or two.  
_

 _"If Angus Black was so bad,  
why did he save me?"  
Maybe he wasn't so bad.  
Maybe, just maybe._

* * *

Ishmael and Jack drove back home where they found darkness inside. The two got out of the car as Ishmael grabbed the gifts from the roof of the car.

"Lights aren't on in the house. Maybe you're mom's out shopping." implied Ishmael.

Then a woman appeared from on top of the roof with a bounce of Christmas lights with her. It was only Jack's mother, Yves.

"Oh, I'm so glad you're home." She cried with enjoyment. "I can feel it, Ishmael. This is the year. When everybody asks you has the most spectacular voice in all of Toonville, they're gonna cry out, "Mrs. Yves Overland"!"

True be told, she was competing in the annual Christmas lighting contest. Again. For every year, bless her heart, she has worked her hands to the bone to win the contest by putting up the best lights, better than everyone else. Ishmael picked up a chandelier and showed it to his wife.

"Isn't this the chandelier from the dining room?" He asked.

"It's all for the cause, dear." His wife assured, pulling up some lights. "Oh, and Jack? Can you be a dear and unscrew the bulb there from the refrigerator please? I missed that one for some reason."

Jack shrugged and went inside. Yves got to work and pulled out a lamp, lantern, any object that provides light that would best suit her needs.

"Every year, Jessica Rabbit has the best lights. But not this year. This year, I'm going to beat that prim, perfect little prissy-"

"Yves!"

A voice interrupted Yves who froze upon hearing the familiar sound that made her cringe with annoyance. She looked next door to see a young, voluptuous woman with long, perfect red hair that covered her right eyes, purple eyeshadow, plump lips and a feminine Santa outfit. For it was no other than Jessica Rabbit, Yves's rival and Mayor Hans's love interest. This gorgeous goddess had won every single lights contest, much to Yves's displeasure. Oh, how Yves wanted to crush her so badly at the contest.

"Hi!" Jessica greeted.

"Jessica!" Yves gasped, dropping her things.

"My, I've never seen so many beautiful Christmas lights, Yves." crowed Jessica in her perfect little sultry voice.

"I'd blow every fuse in the house if I wanted to catch up with you, Jessica." Yves shot back.

Jessica held up an extravagant, shiny antique made of crystals and marveled it to show off at Yves.

"Isn't this antique just divine? It's handcrafted and almost 100 years old." She chimed and walked over to a large object covered with a sheet. "This, however, it new."

She unveiled it to reveal a cannon-like machine with wheels that looks to big to beat in a contest and almost seems to be like cheating. Yves's jaw dropped along with the lights in her hands. She watched as Jessica got behind it, pulled a lever and activated the strange thing and with a loud gun-like fire, it shot out Christmas lights and put them in place on Jessica's house. Yves felt her leg grow weak as she felt like fainting. She still held on the the lights with Ishmael holding the other end. He felt it tug and grabbed it tightly.

"Woah! Yves! Honey! Sweetie!" He yelped.

Yves could do nothing but observed how perfectly Jessica used that new device to put up lights with even using a ladder or anything. She asked herself how she was going to compete against her now. How she was possibly going to top that machine he presumably crafted herself. After was seemed like hours, Jessica shut the device off which was now smoking from it's work. She blew the smoke away, her work now finished before flashing a smug smile to her rival.

"Well, good night, Yves."

Yves nodded, completely blown away and at a loss for words.


	4. Where are you, Christmas?

The phone rang in the Overland residence. Ishmael and Yves both rushed over and grabbed the phone, arguing over who will get it. Ishmael, holding a candelabra, won the battle and answered the phone.

"Hello?" He responded. There came incoherent sentences from the other line.

"Is my sub-zero cooler running?" asked Ishmael and the caller exclaimed in agreement. "I suppose.

The person on the other line, who was none other than Angus standing in a telephone booth, shouted, "Well, you better go and catch it!" before he slammed the phone on the receiver, having up abruptly, leaving Ishmael confused. Angus laughed out loud. Ending the day with a prank call was just what he needed.

"That's a good one." He grinned. "That's rich."

Slash just gave him a blank look, seeming unamused.

"Let's go home." Angus said.

They came upon a large dumpster-based mechanism with Angus opening it's hatch. Slash was about to jump in first before his master stopped him.

"Ah-ah. Fleas before beauty. Thank you." jabbed Angus.

Slash grumbled and jumped down, letting Angus hop in first.

"Come on! Hurry up, slowpoke!" ordered his master.

The dog jumped up and slid down inside, his barks echoing. Angus slammed on a button and down they went, plummeting fast trough the pipe's system that lead up the top of Mt. Everwiffer. This was his easy, though disgusting, way of getting home quicker.

"There's got to be a better way!" screamed Angus as he and his dog slid through the large pipe like a waterslide.

Through zig-zag and pinball-like patterns, they landed in the dump outside of where he lived. The two landed in a pile of junk and old stuff as they climbed out of the mess and panted.

"A car would've payed for itself by now!" Angus spat before he heard rumbling from the pipe. "Oh goodie. Another load's coming down."

A bunch of red trash bags were dumped from the tube and Angus grabbed one of them, laughing excitedly. Then he caught a nasty odor and cringed.

"Ugh! What is that stench!" He said with disgust. "It's fantastic!"

He looked at the bag to see it said "Hazardous Waste".

"Slash, grab a bag!" He said and stood up, carrying one of the bags and made his way back home with Slash behind him. "We'll come back for the rest. Of course, when I say "we", I mean "you". It's amazing what these Toons just throw away! Oh, well. One man's toxic slugs is another man's potpourri."

Slash barked questioningly.

"I don't know. It's some kind of soup."

* * *

That night in his room, Jack stood in his pajamas, standing next to a Christmas tree. He had a lot on his mind about everything. How Angus saved his life even though he's supposed to be bad and how Christmas nowadays is not like it used to be. The poor boy wasn't so sure anymore. All these people were always buying big and expensive toys and other items, putting up pretty lights and decorations, the list was endless. Jack eyed the glowing, decorated tree in front of him and sang:

 ** _JACK: Where are you, Christmas?_**  
 ** _Why can't I find you?_**  
 ** _Why have you gone away?_**

 ** _My world is changing._**  
 ** _I'm rearranging._**  
 ** _Does that mean Christmas changes too?_**

 ** _Where are you, Christmas?_**  
 ** _Do you remember?_**  
 ** _The boy you used to know?_**

 ** _You and I were so carefree._**  
 ** _Now nothing's easy._**  
 ** _Did Christmas change or just me?_**

He looked out his window at Mt. Everwiffer in the distance, thinking about what Angus was doing now.

* * *

Opening the door, Angus stepped in from the cold with his dog and closed the door behind him. He flicked on a light and exhaled from his long day today. He placed the disgusting, stinking bag on a catapult and pulled the lever, sending the bag flying through the air and smack into the face of Mayor Hans on a large poster about him being the next Cheermeister.

"Ooh! Sweet!" Angus remarked.

The bag had fallen through a pipe of some sort and into a whirring contraption. Angus took off his cloak and hung it on a rack of antlers.

" _~Be ever so heinous. There's no place like home.~_ " He sung to himself and viewed his cavern home of machinery and such.

He stood on a platform that slowly descended.

"First floor: factory rejects." He replied. "Those Toons are hard to frazzle, Slash! But we did are worst and that's all that matters. At least I scared the wits out of that little boy at the post office. He'll be scarred for life if we're lucky."

He hopped off of the platform and went behind folding screens that resembled the door to his cave. He hummed to himself as he got dressed, but then, from looking at his shadow, he looked as if we was choking on something as he made sort of gagging noises. This isn't what it looks like. He slowly can out from behind the screens, wearing a black robe.

"Funny he didn't rat on us, though." He confirmed. "Must be afraid of reprisals."

He fired up a machine and placed a screen in front of his chest, which displayed an X-ray, revealing his small heart beating.

"Yes!" He shouted with victory. "Down a size in a half."

He looked towards the readers and quirked, "And this time, I'll keep it off."

His face turned into a frown.

"Get the stick! Get the stick!" Angus riled up Slash and throw him an object, making Slash bark and run after it. Angus chuckled. "There's no stick. I'm smarter."

Angus walked faster and jumped right on his bed on his back. It shook bit on impact as it was held up with springs. He leaned toward his nightstand.

"Any calls?" He asked, turning on his answering machine which said automatically, _"You have no messages."_

"Odd. Better check the outgoing." said Angus who flipped on another switch.

 _"If you utter so much as one syllable, I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH! If you'd like to fax me, press the star key."_

The message played Angus's voice who recorded it to make sure that if anyone tried to call him, they would hang up immediately and leave him alone. Angus gave up and shrugged his shoulders.

"Oh, well." He switch it off and jumped off his bed, hollering like madman while swinging on a grappling line and landing in a recliner chair. "That's more like it."

He sang a tune while removing his socks and tossing him behind him. The socks crawled away like insects. Angus picked up an empty beer bottle and bit off the top with his strong teeth and started to eat the shards of glass. Thankfully, the inside of him was indestructible and painless as his digestive system was anything but normal. He read the label on the bottle.

"Excellent year." He said and laid back to relax. "I tell you, Max! I don't know why I ever leave this place. I have all the company I need right here."

Deciding to have some fun, he cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted out, "Hello!"

 _"Hello!"_

"How are you?"

 _"How are you?"_

"I asked you first!"

 _"I asked you first!"_

"Oh, that's really mature saying exactly what I said!"

 _"Oh, that's really mature saying exactly what I said!"_

Angus got annoyed by his echoes response, hoping that an answer would come back differently than he was says.

"I'm an idiot!" He shouted, intending to outsmart his echo.

 _"You're an idiot!"_

This angered Angus as he fidgeted in his recliner, agitated. Then he whispered in a soft voice, "Alright, fine! I'm not talking to you anymore. In fact, I'm going to whisper so that by the time my voice reverberates off the walls and gets back to me, I won't be able to hear it!"

He waited until his echo repeated, _"You're an idiot!"_

Angus felt humiliated, being outsmarted by his own echo. He sighed and grabbed the bottle he was eating, smashed it into more piece and scarfed them down.

"Am I just eating because I'm bored?" He asked rhetorically.

He moved into a fetal position in his chair and sat quietly. He has been alone all these years with the exception of his dog keeping him company, even though he's too stubborn to see that. He first met Slash when he was just a pup. He was looking for food and shelter when Angus found him. Slash took a shine to Angus and always followed him, much to the latter's annoyance. Wherever Angus went, Slash went. But when the dog helped Angus out with his shenanigans, Angus adopted him and named him. It's just been those two ever since.


	5. Angus's Origins

Once the doorbell rang out, a trio of middle-aged women answered the door. One of them was named Flora who wore red/pink-colored clothing who was the de facto leader of the three. There was Fauna who had on green-colored clothing and then there was the short one named Merryweather who donned blue clothes and was the feisty one of the three.

"Wonder who that could be." Flora said opening the door to see Jack standing there. "Hello, young man. Are you here to read to us?"

"Uh, no. I hear that you know something about this man." answered Jack who showed them a newspaper article about Angus who was spotted near Toonville. The three women gasped when they saw it.

"Angus?" Flora asked, squinting her eyes to read the article closer. "He's been here?"

"My, my! It's been forever!" Merryweather cried.

 _NARRATOR: Jack Frost had some questions_  
 _in his curious heart.  
Why did Angus hate Christmas?  
Where did it all start?_

 _With his dad's recorder,  
there's nothing he would miss..._

"In your own words, I want you all to tell me everything you know about Angus." Jack told them, sitting on the couch and holding a microphone connected to the recorder on the coffee table while the trio sat in front of him. "Where did he come from?"

"Oh!" Flora cried with a chuckle. "He came the way all Toon babies came."

"That's right." Fauna agreed.

* * *

 _ **(FLASHBACK)  
Many Christmases Ago...**_

 _FLORA: On calm nights,_  
 _baby Toon girls and tiny Toon fellas_  
 _drift from the skies in_  
 _their own umbrellas._

 _It was a chilly Christmas night when the small baskets carrying Toon young floated through the dark skies on umbrellas to be delivered to their expecting parents. One of them landed on the doorstep of a house as the baby let out cries. A man opened the door to put out empty milk bottles for the milkman when he spotted his new child._

 _"Hey, honey! Our baby's here!" He called his wife inside the house and leaned down to get a closer look at the baby. "He looks just like your boss."_

 ** _(FLASHBACK END)_**

* * *

"So that's how it works." Jack grinned, understanding.

"Indeed." Merryweather nodded. "That's how you were born too."

"So anyway, it was Christmas Eve and a strange wind blew that night." Flora continued.

* * *

 _ **(FLASHBACK)**_

 _Amongst the rest of baby carriages, one basket contained an infant with pale skin and black hair. The child cooed and squirmed from the wind which increased and made his basket collide against another basket, sending him into the direction of Toonville. The baby's coos turned into a whimpers as his basket landed carefully into the branches of a tree outside of someone's house._

 _MERRYWEATHER: We were having our annual holiday get-together._

 _Everyone inside of the house was having a wild party inside with loud, booming music, laser light show and intense dancing. It was more like a teenager throwing a party after being left home alone by his parents rather than your average Christmas party. Even the trio were enjoying themselves. However, no one was aware of the baby outside the window. Everyone was too distracted having soo much fun, the baby was left outside to freeze. Feeling all alone, the baby whimpered and start to break down into tears and cry._

 _FLORA: It wasn't until the next morning when someone knew he was out there._

 _FAUNA: The poor dear._

 _MERRYWEATHER: But we knew right away that he was special._

 _But every cloud had a silver lining, for the baby was found by the trio and taken into their home were they raised him as one of their own. Merryweather had given him the name "Angus Black" after a literary character from a favorite novel of her's called He Who Follows the Wind: A Sailor's Tale. The infant giggled at that name and had reached his arms out to her. Flora and Fauna had suggested other names, but the child was already named before they had a chance so they ran with it. Little 4-year old Angus sat in his high chair and belched, making the three women giggle._

 _"Do you want a Christmas cookie?"_

 _They surrounded him with a Santa Claus-themed plate of cookies._

 _"Which one would you like?" asked Fauna._

 _"Santa." replied Angus for the first time, making the women gasp with surprise._

 _"His first word!" Flora chirped._

 _"Yes, you wanna hold the Santa plate?" Merryweather asked in her baby voice._

 _They brought the plate closer to him, but as soon as he got a look at the Santa-shaped glass plate, his little baby mind went wild with nightmarish visions and he squirmed and whimpered, pushing the plate away. At first, he had tiny childhood fear of Santa Claus._

 _"No Santa! No Santa!" He cried._

 _They instantly pulled the plate away from him with concerned looks._

 _"Oh, no. It's okay. It's okay. Santa won't hurt you." Flora assured the child, stroking his hair._

 _"Yes, Santa is good. He gives you toys." Fauna agreed with her._

 _"Here you go." replied Merryweather as she grabbed a cookie with green frosting from the plate and handed to Angus. He accepted it, starting to calm down and started eating it._

* * *

 ** _6 Years Later..._**

 _FLORA: He was a wonderful young lad._

 _MERRYWEATHER: And we raised him like any other Toon child. With a deep love for Christmas._

 _Angus was 10 years old now and in the 2nd grade in elementary school. He sat at his desk with the rest like the rest of his classmates drawing in his notebook. 6 years and he was still afraid of Santa Claus and he drew scary pictures of him. Right now, he was sketching Santa as a dangerous creature that devours children with a shadowy appearance, sharp claws, fangs and glowing red eyes. He even drew himself cowering in fear at his_ _presence._

 _"Don't forget, children. Our big Christmas gift exchange is tomorrow!" Their teacher, Mrs. Talgreen, announced. "Everyone bring a special gift for that special someone."_

 _A shade of red decorated Angus's pasty white cheeks. He didn't really have a special someone, but he wished that he did._

 ** _(FLASHBACK END)_**

* * *

"Angus Black?" asked Jessica.

Jack nodded in response. He was now inside Jessica's house, interviewing her next, since she also happened to know Angus since childhood.

"Well, he had no sense of color coordination. Although, I hardly remember him. I didn't have time to socialize. I was always busy with my...studies." explained Jessica with slight hesitance in her voice.

* * *

 ** _(FLASHBACK)_**

 _Sitting at another desk across from Angus's was a young 11-year old girl named Jessica with a perfect soft face, red hair tied into a fluffy ponytail and wearing her school uniform. She was more focused on the black-haired boy as she smiled at him flirtatiously while licking a red lollipop. This girl's heart went out to him and she felt feelings of affection towards him._

 _"Now, class, is everyone almost finished?" asked Mrs. Talgreen._

 _Angus felt eyes on him and looked to his right at the grinning face of Jessica who winked at him. Angus's lips parted and his face heated up. Was this girl trying to come onto me?, he asked himself._

 ** _(FLASHBACK END)_**

* * *

"And if the truth be told, he liked Jessica." added Mayor Hans while the Duke polished his shoes. "Jessica was my girlfriend."

* * *

 _ **(FLASHBACK)**_

 _Somewhere in the front row, a redheaded boy named Hans Westergaard looked behind him to see his crush, Jessica, giving Angus flirty smiles and saw Angus returning a smile and waving at her. This made Hans feel jealous and his chance to ask Jessica out being jeopardized._

 ** _(FLASHBACK END)_**

* * *

"I don't like discussing Black so very close to Christmas, but maybe if you hear the truth, you'll understand why-Put you're back into it!" He ordered the Duke who got distracted and picked up the pace. "I tried to take him under my wing."

* * *

 ** _(FLASHBACK)_**

 _After class was over, everyone grabbed their stuff and was about the leave. Angus went to follow Jessica to talk to her, but was stopped when Hans and his buddies blocked his path._

 _"You don't have a chance with you, weirdo. You're only 10 years old and you're a rarity with a rug for hair." Hans gripped at him and laughed along with his friends and the rest of the class, but not Jessica._

 _Angus felt his face and his stroked his black hair, beginning to doubt his features as well._

 _HANS: That hair, not very pleasant. His skin, not right._

 _Jessica sat at her desk when Angus walked up to her. She looked at him and smiled._

 _"You know, Christmas is my favorite time of year." She told him._

 _Angus had no words to come up with as he stood in front of the girl who stole his heart._

 _"I just love the colors. Red, green." She continued when she rubbed a warm hand against his cheek and gently flicked a piece of his hair. She waved at him daintily and left after winking at him. Angus felt his heart began to beat like drum in a marching band._

 ** _(FLASHBACK END)_**

* * *

"Did I have a crush on Angus?" Jessica chuckled in denial. "Of course not."

"That wasn't my question." corrected Jack.

"Oh." Jessica blushed. "Right."

* * *

 ** _(FLASHBACK)_**

 _Anxious and desperate to impress a certain girl, Angus searched through a garbage pail for something to use._

 _FLORA: For some reason, when he came home that day, he really got into the Christmas spirit for the very first time._

 _He finally found a miniature tuba._

 _"Perfect!" He smiled._

 _Back at home, he pulled out a whole drawer of silverware and dumped them out on the table. Next, he went to the book shelf and open one book, which was a compartment filled with jewelry._

 _"Ah-ha!" He exclaimed and grabbed an heirloom. "What a lovely family heirloom."_

 _He took out a hammer and smashed it into little pieces and used tweezers to place them into the holes of the flaps of a colander. Then he started a small fire inside of a pot which he used to melt some metal pieces._

 _"The fires of love." He grinned. "This'll be perfect on the top of a tree. Oh, Jessica, Oh, Christmas."_

 _Putting on the finished touches of his little project, he placed it on the counter to show that he had created a Christmas angel ornament that goes on the top of the tree. Angus looked at his reflection in the mirror and felt voices call out._

 _(MRS. TALGREEN: I want you all to look you're best tomorrow.)_

 _(HANS: You don't have a chance with her. You're 10 years old and you're a rarity with a rug for hair.)_

 _This made him wonder. Maybe Hans had a point. Maybe Jessica wasn't going to choose someone like him. But he was still determined to prove to her that he had a place in her heart. He pulled out an electric shaver and some face paint with Caucasian colors to make Angus's skin pigment more Caucasian. He had a bad feeling about this. Of course, he wasn't like the rest of the Toons. There wasn't any Toon for miles with messy black hair complete with pale, ghostly-white skin. But he wanted to do it all for Jessica. So against his better judgement, he grabbed the shaver and turned it on as he slowly began to work._

* * *

 _The next day during the gift exchange, everyone has gifted their gifts to each other._

 _"Has everyone given their gifts?" Mrs. Talgreen asked and everyone nodded._

 _"I haven't." Angus's voice responded and the kids looked towards his direction, confused._

 _He came out of hiding from behind the coat rack wearing a paper bag on his head with eye holes and holding his gift for Jessica. Although she was pleased by the hand-made Christmas_ _angel, she was taken aback by the bag he was wearing._

 _"Why do you have a bag on your head?" asked Mrs. Talgreen._

 _"Probably because he's embarrassed by the hideous mess of a gift." Hans jabbed mockingly while everyone laughed._

 _Angus sat at his desk, trying to ignore the humility and insults. The teacher insisted that he took the bag off his head._

 _"Mr. Black, please take the bag off." She urged._

 _He was about to, but hesitated. Angus put a book in front of him, then took it off, but still covered his face, fearing what they would say._

 _"Put the book down." Mrs. Talgreen urged further._

 _He put it down to show he put his foot in front of his face, still hesitant about revealing his looks._

 _"And you're foot."_

 _Angus finally had to face it. Preparing for what Jessica might say, he reluctantly removed his foot from his desk to show his work; he shaved his hair a little too shirt and painted his face to look more normal, but the silliness of it made everyone snicker._

 _"Look at that hack job!"_

 _Then everyone laughed hard at him, lead by Hans, the worst offender of them all. Jessica looked concerned and looked at Angus. At that very moment, everything changed. Took a turn for the worst. Angus's world had come crashing down. He finally got into the Christmas spirit and for what? He worked his butt off to make this delicate present to Jessica and tried to fix his "ugliness" for her as well, only to be laughed at for it. Never has been humiliated in all his life. Something inside of him finally snapped! As his classmates laughed, his face contorted into a furious glare and his face scarlet with rage. Enough was enough! That was the final straw! All this Christmas spirit never did him any good. And how Angus was finally fed up with it all! He got up from his desk and grabbed the angel._

 _"Stupid presents!" He bellowed and throw the gift into the stack of presents, knocking them down, causing everyone to stop laughing and gasp with terror._

 _"Stupid tree!" Angus picked up with with a brutal amount of strength as his heart finally shrunk down and his psyche broke apart._

 _"I HATE CHRISTMAS!"_

 ** _(FLASHBACK END)_**

* * *

"The anger." Hans commented.

"The fury." The Duke said.

"The muscles." sighed Jessica happily.

* * *

 ** _(FLASHBACK)_**

 _At the_ _sound of the boy's roar, everyone scattered, ducked for cover and ran away once Angus tossed the tree at them. The children panicked and Angus ran out the classroom and into the mass hysteria. He looked back at Jessica and saw the fear displayed on her perfect face. He almost cried, seeing her like this, but he was done caring and ran out of the school, not looking back. Jessica picked up the pieces of the destroyed angel and frowned with sorrow. She never wanted it to come to this._

 _JESSICA: It was a horrible day when they were so cruel to him. I could hardly bare it._

 _Now that he was on his own now, Angus climbed the hills of Mt. Everwiffer, ignoring how cold he was. He never wanted to go back to Toonville, never wanted to go back to the trio back home, not after what happened at school. It was too much. He was actually starting to like Christmas, but no one cared. He was just too different for them. Too, he couldn't evade the word, "ugly" for a Toon._

 _"I hate Christmas! I hate it!" He growled as he climbed._

 _JESSICA: And that was the last time we ever saw him. The very last time._

 _Angus made it to the very spot where he would like in solitude away from the dumb Toons. He panted and wiped the tears from his eyes and he gazed upon the town below as he reflected on the events. He always feared Santa Claus since infancy. No on knew he was outside the minute he arrive in his basket. No one even bothered to_ _acknowledge him. Not until the following day when the trio took him in. Jessica. Oh, how he thought about her. The way she looked at him with that perfect smile and how he saw the fear in her eyes during his meltdown. His love for her helped him grow out of his fear for Santa and become interested in Christmas. Sadly, it was all for naught. Nothing lasts forever._


	6. The New Cheermeister Nominee

Angus stood outside of his cave, panting furiously as he looked down at Toonville with a sour frown. His memories flashing in his head, making him angrier.

 _NARRATOR: So whatever the reason,_  
 _his heart or his shoes,_  
 _he stood outside his cave_  
 _hating the Toons._

He pulled out a phone book from behind his back and read from it.

"Alphabetically." He hissed and placed a finger on one name. "Abraham D. Frederick Baulm. I... _HATE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!_ "

He moved on to another name in the book.

"Aaron Stephenson. I hate you." He resumed. "Hate, hate, hate. Hate, hate, hate, double hate, _loathe entirely!_ "

But then the sound of bells and music were heard over the whistling winds from below at Toonville, disrupting Angus. He knew exactly what this meant.

"Nutcrackers." He glared, closing the book. "It's there Toonbilation!"

He put the book in his mouth, biting it.

 _He snarled with a sneer._

Angus gasped, taking the book out of his mouth and said, "Tomorrow's Christmas. It's practically here!"

Tossing the book away, he marched back into his cave.

"SLASH! FETCH ME MY SEDATIVE!"

Back inside of his cave, he sat at the foot of his bed and held a large hammer in his hands.

"Now to take care of those pesky memories." grumbled Angus as he smacked his forehead with the hammer, knocking himself out instantly.

* * *

Back in Toonville, everyone was getting ready the upcoming event of Toonbilation, the one celebration they do every year on Christmas before Christmas morning.

 _"~Toonbilation, Toonbilation, plentiful with candy canes and pies. I can't wait to get there to eat some google fries. Toonbilation, Toonbilation!~"_

Jack and Ishmael were a part of the crowd as they made their way over to Town Hall with the rest of the Toons.

"Dad?" asked Jack.

"Yeah?" His father said.

"I've been thinking a lot about the Toonbilation and I may do something drastic." explained Jack.

"That's fine, son. Ask your mother." Ishmael responded.

Jack looked around to not see her with them. "Where is she, by the way?"

"Oh, honey! Hi!" called Yves as she ran up to them in a rush, holding a traffic light. "Look! I just found the cutest light for my Christmas display."

Suddenly, there came a loud car crash, scared everyone. Yves had obviously stolen it to try to keep up with Jessica for the contest.

"Come on, hurry up. We're gonna be late." Yves rushed them, trying to avoid suspicion.

Everyone surrounded the entrance to the Town Hall and the marching band played their music while Jessica approached the steps in her best outfit. A red top, red elbow-high gloves and a green fluffy skirt. Once she made to the top of the steps and Mayor Hans arrived at the podium, the Toons cheered and applauded until Hans calmed them down so he could speak.

"And now the nominations for that Toon among us who best typifies the quality of Toondom and Toondery, the Toonville holiday cheermeister!" He announced over his microphones.

The Duke unveiled the silver Toonbilation trophy and with that, the citizens went wild and clapped.

"Do I hear a nomination?" asked Hans.

"I nominated Angus Black!" shouted Jack.

Everyone gasped and dispersed to reveal the brown-haired boy to the Mayor as the crowd chattered and exclaimed in both shock and confusion. Mayor Hans chuckled nervously.

"My, what an altruistic child you got there, Ishmael." He grinned falsely.

"Thank you." Ishmael said.

"Jack?" Hans called out for the boy to come closer. "Let me quote a verse in the Book of Toon."

The Duke handed him the Book of Toon and he opened it to a page he was looking for. Hans read from the page, ""The term "Black" shall apply when Christmas spirit is in short supply". Now, I ask you. Does that sound like our holiday cheermeister?"

"True, Mr. Mayor." Jack nodded. "But the book says this too. "No matter how different a Toon may appear, he will always be welcome with holiday cheer."

The crowed debated with some agreement while a few with hesitance about nominating Angus to be the next cheermeister.

"Uh, yes, but the book also states, uh..."The award cannot go to Angus Black because sometimes things get a little offtrack"." Hans stuttered, flipping through the pages, trying to find an excuse not to nominate Angus. No way was he going to have his rival come down here anything soon.

"You made that up! I doesn't say that!" scolded Jack, making everyone gasp.

"No, it does." Hans lied.

"What page?" asked Jack, raising an eyebrow.

Hans stammered, "Lost my place, but it's...it's in here."

"I'm not saying I read the book, but I do know it says thusly: "The cheermeister is the one who deserves a back-slap or a toast. And it goes to the soul at Christmas who needs it the most". And I believe that soul is Angus. And if you all are the Toons I hope you are, you will too."

Everyone agreed and nodded, clapping and cheering. Having made their decision, but the Mayor was indifferent.

"Fine." He said. "You people want to waste a perfectly good nomination, it's up to you. But I am telling you, Black will never come down."

"And if he doesn't, the Mayor will wear the crown." The Duke replied.

"Well, more or less." Hans shrugged.

And the Toons applauded with joy and hope. Angus was nominated to become the new cheermeister, despite Hans's objections. They all sang and celebrated while Jack looked upwards at Mt. Everwiffer, wondering how he was going to convince the lonely curmudgeon to agree.

* * *

The cheers of the Toons rang out and echoes through the cave walls and Angus laid peacefully in his bed, still passed out and beginning to regain consciousness after that solid blow to the head. In his relaxed state, he unknowingly sang along with the music.

" _~Tick tock, tick tock. Counting down the Christmas clock. Old, young. Big, small.~_ Ahhhhhhhhh!" He screamed when he realized what he was doing and sat upright on his bed. Angus grabbed a pillow and covered his ears, trying to block the music.

"Blast this Christmas music!" He growled. "It's joyful and triumphant."

"Must drown them out!"

He grabbed handfuls of nails, screws, anything metallic and put them into blenders, turning them on and other machinery to provide enough loud, disruptive noise to block the cheery singing. But still, even with all the loud sound of metal screws clanging against the glass of the blenders and the shock of electricity, he could still heard the music, much to his chagrin.

"Not working!" screamed Angus.


	7. Persuading the Curmudgeon

Wearing his best coat, Jack climbed up the hills and rocks of Mt. Everwiffer to get to the top and talk to Angus himself and try to get him to come to the Toonbilation.

 _NARRATOR: The whipper-winds whipped_  
 _high above the Toon town._  
 _A trip or a slip and you'd slide  
all the way down  
_

 _But this boy had a mission.  
He knew what to what to mend.  
He'd invite Angus Black himself,  
that brave Jack Overland._

While inside his cave, Angus was up to another attempt to block out the noise by winding up a large cymbal-playing monkey. It sprang to life, clanging it's cymbals together.

"Play, monkey! Play!" shouted Angus with encouragement.

He got on a jackhammer and switched it on, making it vibrate up and down on the ground while Slash watched, moving his head up and down with the jackhammer's movement. Angus hollered out loud all the while. Jack arrived at his doorstep when he heard a loud crash inside along with Angus's cry of pain, "Owie!"

Jack knocked on the door. "Mr. Black?" He called.

No answer surprisingly. So he knocked again and called, "Mr. Black?"

Again no response, only the distant sound of cymbals clanging. Jack opened up the smaller door built for Slash and crawled through. He searched the entire cave, looking Angus and he followed the clanging sound and found him getting his head banged on by the monkey's cymbals, while exclaiming in pain, grunting, yelping and making other nonsensical sounds from each clang. Slash whined and covered his eyes with his paws from his master's foolishness. Jack gently approached him and tapped him on the arm.

"Uh, excuse me?" He asked.

Angus stood up, confused by this and clamped the monkey's cymbals together, making the giant toy short-circuit. Angus slowly, ever so slowly, turned his head to the right to see Jack standing there. Staring up at him was the exact same boy from the post office. He was right there inside of his cave uninvited. Trespassing.

"Hello, little boy." His voice came out a low growl, until he turned to him, trying to make himself look fierce. "How dare you enter the lair of Angus Black! The impudence! The audacity! The unmitigated gall! You've called down the thunder! Now get ready for the _BOOM!_ Gaze into the face of fear! _Booga-booga!_ "

But Jack was unfazed by his ridiculous attempt to frighten him out of his cave. He wasn't going to give up.

"Yeah. Mr. Black, my name is Jack Overland." Jack introduced himself.

"You see? Even now that terror is welling up inside you." taunted Angus as he circled Jack menacingly.

"I'm not scared." Jack told him.

"Denial is to be expected in the face of pure evil." Angus grinned evilly and got close to Jack's face, growling out loudly and wagging his tongue around.

The brown-haired boy backed away a step, but still not breaking.

"I don't think so." Jack interrupted, making Angus freeze.

"Doubt!?" groused Angus. "Another unmistakable sign of the heebie-jeebies!"

He faced him with his best glare, determined to show this trespassing boy that he was not to be reasoned with.

"Now you're...doomed!"

Angus left for a second and came back wearing a white T-shirt. He made it sound as if he were being choked or stabbed or having a heart attack while convulsing melodramatically, tearing the shirt from the middle. Jack still didn't run away, but started to giggle, amused by Angus's episode.

"Run for your life before I kill again!" He screamed, ripped the shirt off of him and howled.

"I'm a psycho!" He suddenly said and shook his head vigorously and panted like a dog, shook the torn shirt in his mouth before tossing it away.

"Danger! Danger!"

Angus began to jump around, flailing his arms about, trying desperately to frighten the boy. He got in his face a few times, grunting, growling until finally stopping after a short while. He panted from exhaustion, seeing that Jack had still not run away. All these trouble just to scare him away. Jack's been frighten by him before when he first met him, but that was only one time.

"I think you need a time-out." Jack replied.

It's as if Angus were turned to stone. His eyes blank, wide open, mouth agape. Jack chuckled at his reaction and Angus turned away, crossing his arms and pouting.

"Kids today." He grumbled. "So desensitized by movies and television."

"WHAT DO YOU WANT!?" Angus screamed into Jack's face, wanting him gone already.

"Mr. Black." began Jack as he grabbed the invite from his coat pocket. "I came all this way to invite to be the new holiday cheermeister."

Angus pondered this and asked, "Holiday toonbi-what-y?"

"Cheermeister." corrected Jack and allowed Angus to read the invite.

"'Cheermeister. Celebrate with friends"." He grumbled before howling with laughter. "That's a good one!"

The Man in the Snow took off, but Jack followed him to persuade him further.

"I know you hate Christmas. But what if it's all just a big misunderstanding?" asked Jack, anxious.

"Don't care."

"I mean, I, myself, am having the Yuletide doubts."

Angus pretended to snore, as if nodding off in the middle of his talk.

"But maybe if you would reunite with the Toons and be a part of Christmas."

""Maybe if you reunite with the Toons and be a part of Christmas"." Angus mocked Jack, before growling, "Grow up!"

"Then maybe it'll be alright for me, too!" Jack continued.

Angus checked his fake-watched and replied sarcastically, "I'm sorry, your session is over. Please make another appointment with the receptionist on the way out."

"Come one, you gotta accept the award!" begged Jack on his last leg.

But when the word "award" came through, Angus immediately stopped in his tracks with a look of interest.

"Award?" He asked with disbelief and zipped back over to Jack, got down on his knees and held his cheeks. "You never mentioned an award."

"Yeah, with the trophy and everything!" nodded Jack.

"And I won?" asked Angus.

"YOU WON!"

Angus then thought, "That means there were losers."

"I guess." Jack shrugged. "So if you would come-"

"A town full of losers!" Angus cackled, getting back to his face. "I like it! Is there anyone emotionally shattered? Come on! A minute ago, I couldn't shut you up! Details! Details!"

"Well, Mayor Hans wasn't happy at all."

Angus groaned at the mention of the despicable mayor's name and shook his head, "No."

"Jessica Rabbit will be there." Jack suggested.

Then Angus's mind went back to the girl who stole his heart in school when he raised an eyebrow at Jack.

"Oh, she will?" He asked to which Jack nodded.

"And she'll see me a winner?"

Jack nodded again.

"She'll be on my like flies to dead flesh." Angus stated and pointed in another direction, imagining Jessica. "Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Jessica baby! But the A-train has left the station!"

"So you'll come?" asked Jack with a hopeful grin.

Angus looked at him pointedly. After all, he hasn't seen Jessica in years and wondered what she thought about him nowadays.

"Oh, alright." He sighed and the boy chuckled. Angus put on a fake smile and put a hand on Jack's back, walking him towards the door. "I don't know if it's that adorable twinkle in your eye or that nonconformist streak that reminds me of younger, less creepy me. But you've convinced me. Who knows? This Toonbilation could change my entire outlook on life!"

"Really?" Jack asked smiling.

"No." Angus's grin vanished and was replaced by an annoyed frown as he yanked on a rope from the ceiling and just like that, a trapdoor opened underneath Jack, sending him toward and sliding. His invite flew out of his hand mid-plummet and landed on the ground in Angus's cave. The Man in the Snow crossed him arms, finally glad that the trespassing boy was finally gone. But Slash picked the card up with his mouth and presented it to his master. Angus looked confused, then frowned, seeing that Slash wants him to accept the invitation. Back with Jack, he laughed, having so much fun sliding through the tube and he finally flew out of the opening into Toonville as he landed in a pile of snow. He breathed and exhaled.

"That's was fun." He panted.

Ishmael came around a corner, looking around for his son and finally found him laying in the snow.

"There you are, Jack." He said, coming to him and grabbing his hand, bringing him with him. "You can make snow angels later. We can't be late for the Toonbilation."

* * *

Angus yelled while sliding down the grappling line and into his recliner while holding the invite. He was giving this some slight thought and has having a mental argument with himself about going or not. Never has he been invited to anything in Toonville, especially during Christmas. It's the first time the Toons, or rather one of them, invited him to attend a celebration and it's been forever to say the least.

"The nerve of those Toons." He grumbled. "Inviting me down there on such short notice. Even if I wanted to go, my schedule wouldn't allow it!"

Leaning to his left, he turned his attention to a book on the table beside him and opened it up to review the events he had profoundly, albeit pathetically planned for himself.

"4:00 , wallow in self-pity. 4:30, stare into the abyss. 5:00, solve world hunger. Tell no one. 5:00, jazzercise. 6:30, dinner with me. I can't cancel that again. 7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing. I'm booked!"

However, with some conscience left, he started to re-think his schedule while still deciding whether to accept Jack's invite.

"But I moved the loathing to 9:00, I'd still have time to lay in bed, stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness." muttered Angus to himself and he took a deep inhale before he exclaimed, "But what will I wear?"


	8. The Toonbilation Celebration

Angus reluctantly made up his mind to accept the invitation and scouted across his cave to look for something more fitting to wear for the Toonbilation and to make himself look presentable. However, there wasn't much around the cavern to wear as Angus never did have much besides a pair of pants. For his first choice, he settled with some tablecloth from a small table covered with junk. He gripped the cloth and removed it from underneath the junk with a single quick slip and walked away, leaving the pile of metal on the table that hasn't so much as made a small budge when he slipped the cloth out from underneath. Of course, Angus came back and knocked all cans and stuff to the floor and left again, not before tipping the table to the floor.

He stood in front of a full-length mirror wearing the cloth as a so-called garment that looked more like a skirt. He studied his reflection in the mirror, turning side to side to see if it was a perfect fit. Slash barked out a response and Angus frowned.

"It's not a dress, it's a kilt!" He growled at his dog's ridiculous comment before removing the cloth revealing a garter belt strapped to his right leg. "Sicko!"

On he searched for more clothing in his wardrobe. As said before, he never had much beside the occasional pants he wore. But that didn't mean he didn't have a few other attires. However, most of his clothes weren't as public friendly as could be. Most of them were either ripped or torn or had some holes in them due to overuse and some were just dirty and filthy which he never washed since he didn't care much for the uncleanliness. He tossed out some unwanted garments out while Slash watched.

"Stupid! Ugly! Out of date!" grumbled Angus with frustration. "This is ridiculous. If I can't find something nice to wear, then I'm not going!"

He was about to storm off to pout on his bed when something made him freeze and catch him off guard. He stopped and listened closely as it was the sound of yodeling, echoing off the cave walls. It donned on him that some mountain climber had scaled his mountain and was now shouting his victory out loud through a horn by yodeling. Suddenly an idea came to Angus's mind. He must have clothes that he could use. Sneaking outside and behind the disruptive yodeler, he grabbed him by the neck with a vaudeville hook and yanked him back before knocking him out unconscious with a rock and taking his clothes. Now clad in the yodeler's attire, he checked himself out in the mirror. He looked rather pleased to finally find clothes and after doing a few poses, he grunted and padded off.

"That's it. I'm not going."

* * *

The Toonbilation was beginning and everyone gathered around the Toonville Town Hall and surrounded the big Christmas tree as the band played and lights turned on. The cheer amongst the crowd settled once Mayor Hans tapped the microphones to get their attention. Once they were silent, Hans spoke.

"Well, it's time for our Holiday Cheermeister of the Year Award!" He announced excitedly as the citizens roared with cheer. "Congratulations, Mr. Black!"

He gestured to his right as if expecting Angus to be standing there, but didn't see him there and gasped to the crowd in fake shock. Hans was expecting this to happen and immediately felt glad that the maniac was nowhere in sight, which means he could be the next cheermeister instead of him.

"Oh my gosh. He didn't show? Who could've predicted this?" asked Hans rhetorically.

* * *

After re-thinking his decision, Angus had his arms crossed and finally made up his mind.

"Alright. I'll swing by for just a minute, allow them to envy me, grab a handful of popcorn shrimp and blow out of there." Angus debated and headed for the door, but stopped to think for a second. "But what if it's another cruel prank? What if it's a cash bar? How dare they! Alright, I'll go. But I'll be fashionably late."

He flicked an index finger in an out while having a final moment to determine his last choice. "Yes, no, yes, no, yes!" He growled. "Definitely not!"

Then he made his way to the door while Slash watched him and waited for him to go.

"Alright! I have made my decision! I'm going at that's that!" He told Slash, but then looked at his crossed fingers. "Oh, I had my fingers crossed."

But Slash had had enough of his antics and wanted him to go so badly. So to get him to go by force, he pulled the rope and activated the trap door that sent Angus into the tube to Toonville.

"Maybe I should flip a coin!" He screamed, mentally not wanting to go back to Toonville, but he had no other choice. He hollered, he yelled as he was pulled through the wide pipe.

* * *

Jack was disappointed that Angus didn't bother to show up and accept Christmas, even for just once this year. The Mayor continued.

"Well, then I guess the award goes to the...the runner-up." Hans suggested.

"That's right." The Duke took over. "A man for whom Christmas comes not once year, but every minute of every day."

The Toons all nodded in agreement and chattered amongst themselves.

"A handsome and noble man. A man who's had his tonsils removed twice."

Everyone laughed, while Jessica groaned in disgust.

"That's an interesting story." Hans replied, hoping to avoid embarrassing comments. "But what happened was..."

He was cut off when he heard a loud rumble. Everyone watched as the garbage tube open up and out popped Angus. He shot out of the pipe and flew into the air, screaming and flailing wildly. He smacked against the marching band's drum, sending him flying backwards. Angus slingshotted off a "Toonbilation 1,000" banner and was flung forward where he landed face-first right into Jessica's chest who gasped in surprise.

"Hello, Jessica." His muffled voice came from between her breasts.

"I made it! I told you he'd come!" Jack shouted with joy.

Angus got off of Jessica and stood to his feet, staring dangerously at the crowd who gasped at the sight of him. His head turned to face Mayor Hans, his long-time rival, the who person who bullies him in school and caused him to hate Christmas in the first place. Staring back, Hans stood still like a statue with green eyes burning into his soul with pure hatred. Angus moved a bit closer to him, like a wolf preying on a rabbit, watching it's every move and waiting for the right time to pounce and attack. Angus then quickly came face-to-face with Hans, making everyone exclaim in fear. His eyes fell upon the crowd as they all stared back and waited for him to do something. Angus fought back an eye-roll, seeing the Christmas-laden town as it usually it this time of year. Finally, he broke the still silence with a "Boo." and the Toons all shrieked and back away a step.

"Hot crowd. Hot crowd."

Jessica got a good look at him after all these years. He sure has grown, she thought.

"I believe I'm here to..." He liked his teeth. "...except an award of some kind. And the child mentioned a check."

"I did not." Jack corrected as his parents placed their hands on his shoulders.

"Alright, then give me the award. COME ON, WHILE I'M YOUNG!" He screamed impatiently, wanted to just grab his award and leave this stupid town as he called it.

"Don't you worry, Mr. Holiday Cheermeister." Hans informed him. "You'll get you're award. But first, a little family reunion. They raised you, they nursed you, they clothed you. Here they are, your old biddies!"

From out of the crowd, Flora, Fauna and Merryweather, the ones who raised Angus since infancy, emerged from the rest of the toons and smiled, seeing their own "child" again after so long. Angus only glared at them.

"Are you three still living?" He asked.

"We missed you!" The trio gushed while Angus grunted.

"Let me see the sweater, Merryweather." Flora ordered her accomplice.

"Sweater?" asked Angus while they chattered and came closer. "What are you talking about? I can't do that. I say-AH!"

But, unfortunately, the trio along with a few other Toons surrounded him against his objections while Hans chuckled.

"Don't touch me there!"

Angus finally got them to back off, but when he did, he noticed that he was now wearing a Christmas sweater with blinking lights. He yelped in surprise. The crowd roared and shouted with enthusiasm as they brought forth a large chair.

"Put him in the Chair of Cheer!" A local drunkard shouted.

"What? What's a Chair of Cheer?" asked Angus to Merryweather, then he looked at Jack. "You didn't tell me about the Chair of Cheer!"

"Come on, Mr. Black? Please?" begged Jack.

"No, no, no! Honestly! I can't do it! I'm not ready! It's too much too soon! AH!" Angus tried his best to object, but his protests were on deaf ears and they forced him into the Chair of Cheer.

"Yes, it's that time of year." Hans announced. "The cheermeister's ride in the Chair of Cheer!"

Angus was immediately not enjoying this already, not one bit.

"Put me down! I mean it! I'll get a lawyer! There'll be hell to pay!"

"First, you'll put your taste buds to the test the Toon-pudding cook off!" announced the Mayor.

"Toon-pudding cook off!" The Duke screamed along with him, earning him a glare of annoyance from Hans.

Angus was seated and had a napkin tucked from his collar and was being fed Toon-pudding against his will. He didn't have the best taste buds as whatever was being put in his mouth tasted bad to him.

"Mine's first!"

"I really don't know-!" Angus tried to say, before being fed.

"You'll enjoy this!"

They put more and more in his mouth. One of the local bakers fed him some as well. "This is not pudding, however."

Angus spat some of it out and asked, "Well, what is it?"

He suffered more hours of this heinous torture and a Toon held a spoon of something to him. He shook his head for him not to feed it to him, but another Toon opened his mouth for him and the spoon was put inside. Soon after, Angus was put in the lead of a conga line as everyone, but him, danced to the conga music.

"See? Look at the time! I really should be getting back!" Angus tried to get them to listen, but they pushed him, forcing him to cooperate. "Alright!"

Angus danced exaggeratedly along with the dancer while Jessica watched and shook her head to the beat.

"Fruitcake! Fra-la-la!"

Once again, he was put into the eating contest as Angus was now being force-fed fruitcake. One offered one to him.

"No." He pleaded, but they shoved some in his mouth anyway.

Later, they carried across the crowd in the Chair of Cheer, going up and down, making Angus feel a wave of nausea set in front the amount of fruitcake and pudding. He held his mouth closed, trying to his best to not vomit.

"Fudge judge!"

Angus was getting annoyed by this sick game and they now had fudge.

"Made it myself!"

They placed them into his mouth and he began to chew.

"Mine are homemade too." The cashier from Schlesinger's replied, giving him some as well.

"Put it in!" Angus urged defiantly, now feeling determined to win this. "Is that all you got? Is that all you got?"

They carried him again in the Chair of Cheer while Angus held his overstuffed stomach, looking green in the face. Next, they had a bag race and Angus was beginning to participate. He ran past the other racers full of confidence and determination and he held his arms out with pride as he crossed the finish line and broke past the ribbon. Everyone cheered and Jessica was about to join, but she cut herself off, thinking if she should. Angus had won the bag race and he cheered to himself while the Toons applauded and shouted with encouragement. Hans's face fell with disappointment as he had hoped he would lose. Jack and his family cheered as well.

"He's number one in the sack bag run!" The drunkard declared, handing Angus his ribbon.

"NUMBER ONE! I'M NUMBER ONE! I'M NUMBER ONE!" Angus screamed with great pride at his accomplishment. "NO ONE CAN BEAT ANGUS BLACK!"

He cheered and whooped, now enjoying the praise he was receiving. The proud Angus blew out kisses to everyone as he was carried in the Chair of Cheer. For the first since his childhood, he was actually beginning to like Christmas once again. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all. Maybe he just needed a little pick-me-up. He stood by Hans and Jessica at the podium, wearing his crown, made of a Christmas wreath. Angus clapped and laughed.

"And now it's time for the moment we've all been waiting for!" Hans said on the microphone as Angus put his arm around his shoulder.

"Ah, yes! My award!" Angus agreed and whispered into Hans's ear, "Write the check."

"There is no check."

"Are you sure?" asked Angus looking at Jessica. "Because I was sure someone mentioned a check."

"There is no check." Hans repeated. "And now it's time for Present-Pass-It-On! As always, we start with our Cheermeister."

A small present was given to Angus. Surprised that someone had actually offered him a present for the first time, he couldn't help but squeal with glee. Angus grabbed the present, opened it and took out the gift. His smile disappears as his eyes laid upon an electric shaver. The same exact electric shaver he had used to cut his hair in school, which caused everyone to humiliate him. He stared at it intensely and gripped it in his fingers. Why would I get this now after it caused his episode years ago?

"The gift of a Christmas haircut." Hans smiled.


	9. The Revenge of Angus

The entire town of Toonville laughed at the gift Angus had received. He switched the shaver on and it buzzed and, with a frown forming on his face, Angus remembered that dreadful moment in all his life. That one disaster that changed everything for the worse. The memory of him using the shaver on himself to cut his messy, black hair short and the face paint to look more normal as the rest, only to fail miserably.

 _"Look at the hack job!"_

The laughter, the humiliation, the burning rage, the years of hatred. All of his efforts to be one of them, to win Jessica's heart have lead to this. The one moment that caused Angus to hate Christmas to begin with. And now, here Hans was, humiliating him all over again and making everyone laugh at his expense. Angus growled and exhaled a dangerous breath of air, clutching the shaver tighter until his fists turned whiter; the boiling sensation boiled his conscience, the undeniable plague filled his thoughts, the reemerging hatred for the cheerful, gift-giving, joy-spreading, holy holiday that is Christmas!

"Ah, yes. Good times! Good times!" Hans chuckled, patting Angus on the back. "And now I have something for the love of my life."

Hans stood on one knee in front of Jessica, while a drumroll played.

"Jessica Rabbit,..." He opened up a small box to reveal a shiny, crystal ring. "...will you become Mrs. Hans Westergaard?"

Angus gasped as well as everyone else as they eyed the scene with awe and delight. Jessica's breath came out uneasily and her heart skipped a beat when she observed the extravagant band ring as it glistened glamorously. Angus couldn't believe what was happening. He gets forced to eat Christmas confectionary, he was given the shaver that was his downfall and now childhood bully was proposing to the girl he had first laid eyes upon. The girl that made him feel warm inside, that made his heart beat faster than a marathon. Hans was now adding to Angus's displeasure by doing this?!

"Westergaard?" asked Jessica as she shared a look with Angus.

"If you agree to be my wife, along with a lifetime supply of happiness, you'll also receive this." Hans grabbed the microphone and grinned. "It's a new car! Generally paid by the tax-payers of Toonville!"

The Duke stood by an expensive-looking, new red car with a large ribbon wrapped around it like at a game show. Angus could see that he was bribing Jessica to agree to his proposal to spite him.

"What do you say, my dear?" asked Hans as the marching played a ticking-like tune as if playing a timer. "You've got 20 seconds on the clock."

"Well,...I..." Jessica stuttered, trying to find an answer. What could she say? After everything Hans had done for her, it was nice of him, but now that Angus was here, watching everything, she had no idea what to say. She never did have any romantic feelings for the Mayor. "...these gift are quite dazzling and adorable."

Suddenly, there came a loud scratching noise and everyone covered their ears. Yes, in fact, Angus sneaked his way over to the car and was dragged his sharp nails across the car's paint job, leaving marks in the it's body and making a loud screeching noise like nails running across a chalkboard. He stopped and glared at the entire crowd. His anger and hate for the holidays had returned and now he was even madder than ever. He wasn't going to let the humility get to him a second time. Not now. He was done!

"Of course, they are. That's what it's all about, isn't it?" He asked with a fake smile. "It's what it's always been _about!_ "

"Gifts, gifts." He walked over to some Toons, pointing at them. "Gifts! Gifts! Gifts! Gifts! Gifts!"

Everyone backed away from him as he closed in on them.

"You wanna know what happens to your gifts?" He asked. "They all come to me in your garbage. You see what I'm talking about, huh? In! Your! Garbage!"

The crowd yelped as his tone of voice, but he continued ranting and raving.

"I could hang myself with all those stupid Christmas neckties I found in the dump!" He turned to glare at Hans and Jessica. "And the avarice."

Angus jabbed a finger towards them and shouted, "The avarice never ends! I want golf clubs! I want diamonds! I want a freaking pony so I can ride it twice, get bored with it and sell it to make beef cuts!"

The Toons gasped, getting more scared of him by the minute.

"Look, I hate to make waves, BUT THIS WHOLE CHRISTMAS SEASON IS STUPID, STUPID STUPID!" He screamed into some Toons' faces and they backed away from his wrath.

"There is, however,..." He shot a pleasured glance at Jessica and slowly crept up to her. "One teeny, tiny Christmas tradition I find...quite meaningful."

He snatched the mistletoe from the top of Jessica's ring box and held it up above him.

"Mistletoe. Now pucker up and kiss it, Toonville!"

Angus held over his backside and shook the leaf, making Jessica faint and the Toons to panic. To further cause pain, Angus grabbed the shaver and shaved a clearing down the middle of Hans's head which made him yelp with his mouth wide open.

"Uh oh! Someone's...fabulous!" He cried mockingly and kissed Hans on the cheek and spits it out in disgust.

The curmudgeon's actions created mass hysteria among the crowd, making everyone panic even more. They screamed in terror and tried to run away. Angus ditched his wreath crown and tore away the sweater, leaving in the lederhosen he had stolen before he went full-on wild on the Toons, roaring, shouting and causing a riot. Jack was grabbed and carried away by his frightened family. Angus came up to the drunkard.

"Excuse me, old-timer!" Angus grabbed his jar of whiskey. "Mind if I wet my whistle?"

"Well, uh..."

Angus pulled the cork out with his teeth and spat it out. He took a huge swig of the alcoholic beverage and tossed the jar away. The drunkard was too late to catch it as it shattered on the ground.

"That's my good stuff!"

Grabbing a blow torch, he spat the contents into the flames and onto the tree, seeing it ablaze. The Toons stopped to watch their precious, glorious tree burn up.

"Burn, baby, burn!"

The big tree was nothing, but a pile of ashes now and the large star that sat on the top fell into the pile while Angus laughed evilly.

"Oh, wow." Jessica moaned.

"Oh, the humanity!" Angus mocked and ran about to continue his rampage.

"Do something now!" Hans ordered the Duke.

"Got it."

Hans walked away to try and think of something to do when he heard the shaver turn on and he saw the Duke shave his own hair down the middle. Hans groaned at his stupidity. A police car drove about the streets.

 _"Calling all units! Calling all units!"_

Angus stopped at the street and saw a cab.

"Taxi!" He held his hand out to get it's attention, but it raced passed him, not even bothering to stop before him. "That's because I'm white isn't it?!"

But then he saw something come his way and he held up his hand for it to stop.

"HALT!"

He lifted his foot, making a smaller vehicle stop. Driving it were Bernard and Miss Bianca and Angus looked down at them.

"Evening, folks. Mind if I ride along?" He asked before he picked up the tiny car. "You might want...STEP OUT!"

He throw the mice couple out and onto the city street, then he placed it back down and got inside of it. However, because of his size, he could only manage to sit upon hit and hold the small steering wheel with his fingers.

"Thanks, by the way! You did the right thing! If you don't have insurance, I'll send you a paycheck!"

He sped off on the small automobile, driving through the small crowd of panicking Toons.

"Out of the way!" He shouted.

Angus drove around, passing more Toons and knocking some over. Then he flew into the air on the car and landed safely on the ground, continuing his joyride.

"That's gonna hurt in the morning!"

He cackled at the disaster he left in his wake, but then gasped when he saw he was driving right at a mother and her baby. Angus skidded the car to the right, but this only caused the car to spin around out of control, having no momentum. He yelled as he spend around and around and finally crashed into a fire hydrant. He laid in the snow until he heard the sparkles of electricity. The tiny car was leaking gas and was starting a fire. And fire and gasoline do not mix!

"It's gonna blow!" screamed Angus as he rushed to his feet and ran for his life. Then there came a massive explosion and Angus jumped out of sight away from the incoming flames.

Now that Angus had taken out the vengeance he wanted more than ever and left without a trace, every Toon in Toonville was in deep depression that their glorious holiday celebration was toiled and ruined. Jack looked around at the traumatized Toons and saw Hans and Ishmael standing over the ash pile of burnt sticks and broken ornaments that was once their proud Christmas tree. Hans sighed sorrowfully and turned to Ishmael.

"I'm hurt, Ishmael." Hans said with heavy heart. "I'm hurt and I don't hurt easily. But you and you're family, I'm so...so disappointed."

He wagged a finger at Jack for his mistake and the boy looked sad that his plan to make Angus feel good again failed.

"Can we just get back to Christmas the way it should be?" Hans asked, putting on the wreath crown. "Black-less? Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!"

Hans went around, cheering joyfully to re-boost the Toons' confidence and hope while Ishmael, Yves, Esler and Ewing looked at Jack.

"All I wanted was for everyone to be together for Christmas." Jack said, voice breaking, on the verge of tears.


	10. Becoming Santa Claus

Angus cackled from his achievement, feeling so proud of himself for that insane rampage and finally getting even with that no-good Mayor. He approached the garbage chute and opened the hatch.

"I quite enjoyed that. I hope I get another invite soon." He laughed out loud, but suddenly he stopped when he witnessed the Toons carried yet another tree similar to the one he destroyed.

"Come on, folks! Good thing we have a spare!" Hans ordered.

After all of that, the Toons still had hope of rebuilding Christmas and Angus glared with fire in his eyes, incensed that his actions did nothing to end their celebration.

"Suffering swordfish! They're relentless!" Angus screamed and slammed the button which sent him down the chute.

Meanwhile, on the town clocktower, the bells toll as the time changes to _0 Days, 4 Hours and 0 Minutes_.

"Only four hours 'till Christmas!" The old man announced.

* * *

 _NARRATOR: Yes, Angus knew that tomorrow  
all the Toon girls and boys  
would wake up bright and early  
and rush for their toys.  
_

Returning to his home on Mt. Everwiffer, the furious Angus paced around outside his cave as his mind ran wild with the thought of all the children playing with their toys, making him seethe in rage.

"...and then, oh, the noise!" He grimaced. "Oh, the noise, noise, noise, noise, NOISE! They'll bang on tong-tinglers, they'll blow their floo-flounders, they'll crash on hang-jinglers and bounce on boing-bounders!"

 _Then the Toons, young and old_  
 _would sit down for a feast._  
 _And they'll feast_  
 _and they'll feast._

"And they'll feast, feast, feast, feast, feast!" Angus shouted, stomping up and down on his feet, then kicked the snow. "They'll eat their Toon-pudding! And rare Toon roast beast! Something I just can't stand in the least."

All of the sudden, his eyes widened in realization at his words.

"Oh, no. I'm speaking in rhyme!" whined Angus as he ran to the edge of a cliff, screaming a roar of anger and letting it echo upon the blistering wind. He dropped to ground, weeping, "BLAST WHO TOONS!"

 _And the more Angus thought  
of what Christmas would bring.  
The more Angus thought..._

He sat up with a light bulb buzzing in his skull.

"I must stop this whole thing." Standing up, he stormed back to his door. "Why for year after year, I put up with it now! I must stop this Christmas season from coming! But now?"

Angus gasped, realizing he was rhyming again. "I mean, in what way?"

But he had no other excuse and gave up. So with a mock gag, he entered through the door and there came a look of shock at what he found inside. There were Christmas lights hung up along with decorations and Christmas music playing on a radio. He saw Slash jumping around on his hind legs with his paws in the air, dancing, wearing a Santa hat and enjoying the holiday season. Angus mocked his dancing and gave him a sarcastic smile.

"Are you having a holly, jolly Christmas?" He asked him, his face turning sour.

The music was cut off and the door flung open as Angus tossed both Slash and his doghouse out into the cold.

"Wrong-O!"

Peering over the edge, he found the cookie-cutter hole shaped like Slash in the deep snow where he had landed. Angus harrumphed and jumped down and picking Slash up, staring at him directly in the eye.

"If you're not going to help me, then you might as well-" His sentence froze when he got a good look at Slash's face. The dog had snow around the front of his muzzle which looked like a beard.

 _Then he got an idea._  
 _An awful idea.  
Angus had a wonderful,  
awful idea._

Angus smiled with a maniacal look on his features.

"I know just what to do." He grinned.

His mind was made up. The perfect plan to take away their perfect holiday as the excellent revenge scheme. Angus was going to pose as Santa Claus, sneak into their house and steal all of their presents while they are sleeping. He retreated back his cave with make and got out some red fabric and knitting tools. He cut out a piece for the chest area of the coat, leaving an open coat-shaped hole in the fabric. Then he assembled the sewing machine to sew up the fabric while Slash carefully pulled it with his mouth.

 _Angus laughed in his throat._

"Ha." He chortled while working.

 _And he made a quick_  
 _Sandy Claus hat and a coat._

He heard a crunching sound and yelped in sudden pain. Lifting his hand up, he saw that he had accidentally sewed his own fingers into the fabric. His eyes rolled back as he fainted.

 _And he chuckled and clucked_  
 _at this great fiendish trick._

The suit was finally finished and Angus stood in front of the mirror, wearing a Santa hat, coat with a belt, keeping his pants on and wore winter boots as well. Angus grinned sinisterly at his reflection.

"With this coat and this hat, I'll look just like St. Nick. Ho ho ho!" Angus laughed like Santa, before he began to sang pridefully at his clever work.

 _ANGUS: You're a mean one, Mr. Black._  
 _You really are a heel._  
 _You're as cuddly as a cactus_  
 _and as charming as an eel, Mr. Bla-ack._

 _You're a bad banana with a  
greasy black peel._

Next was to build the sleigh to carry all the items in. Using his crafting expertise, an inventing fellow such as himself wouldn't have any trouble creating the land vehicle or in this case, an air vehicle. He searched through the dump and retrieved some scraps and other junk needed. He picked up a rotten banana peel and began to eat it. Inside his cave, he whopped while zipping across the grappling line. The sleigh was coming along rather nicely.

 _Just face the music  
you're a monster, Mr. Black_  
 _Yes, you are.  
_

He lifted the soldering helmet from his face and sang, " _~You're heart's an empty hole!~_ "

 _You're brain full of spiders  
You got garlic in you're soul, Mr. Bla-ack._  
 _I wouldn't touch you with a_  
 _thirty-nine-in-a-half-foot pole._

Angus grabbed a scalding Phillips head screw from the fire with metal tongs and placed it into his mouth. Thankfully, because he's been in the cold for so long, he was immune to both the cold and extreme heat. His ears and nostrils smoked and he spat the screw into his hand. Slash pulled on a rope that carried an airplane engine with Angus standing on it. The determined man worked like mad, attaching electrical parts to the sleigh, putting wavy metal sheets for it's body, he even had a lifting seat that helps him reach to too-hard-to-reach areas. While working on the underside, Slash brought him a screwdriver. Angus, wearing goggles, inspected closely. This wasn't what he had asked for.

"I asked for 3-quarters, not 5-8's. Stay focused!" Angus ordered sternly and gave it back to his dog. Slash whined and got to work.

 _You know, if you ask if_  
 _who's the Toon of Toonville,  
No one would deny it!_

Once the part that propelled the sleigh into the air was complete, it needed to be tested. So Angus sat in a prototype, wearing a test dummy outfit and football helmet and about to be blasted into a target riding on tracks which lit up. He gave a thumbs up to Slash when he was ready and the mongrel pressed the button with his paw and before he could even blink, Angus was blast forward faster than a race car on the track during a race at NASCAR. The speed increased and he did just that. Angus struggled to stand up from the wreckage and felt his joints and bones crackle.

"Ow." He winced and had to lift his head up to look at Slash, since his neck was incapacitated. "Air bag's a little slow."

Suddenly, the air bags deployed, inflated with a slight squeak. But it was too late for that since they didn't stop him in time from crashing and injuring himself.

"But that's what these tests are for!"

 _You're a vile on, Mr. Black._  
 _You have termites in your smile._

Having recovered from the injury and that minor setback, Angus viewed himself in a rearview mirror for the sleigh. He grinned to show that his words were fact; termites crawled around on his disgusting yellow teeth. Then Angus was pounding on something with a hammer before he picked it up and blew the dust off it with a smile. It was a license plate that said "Mean 1".

 _You have all the tender sweetness  
of a sea-sick crocodile, Mr. Black_

 _Given the choice between you,_  
 _I'd take the...sea-sick crocodiiiiiiiiiiiilllllllleeeeee!_

Angus remained on the final word to the final verse of his song while spinning around and around in the lifting seat over his completed sleigh. But he was spinning to fast without stopped as he felt all the fruitcake and pudding he was forced to eat earlier come up and he could barely hold it down. Slash ducked once he gave in.

And now with the sleigh placed outside, Angus observed the activity going on down at Toonville through binoculars. Santa Claus was his yearly routine; delivering presents to the Toons in their houses while the anti-Santa known as Angus waited for him to finish his work and leave.

"Fat boy should be finish up anytime now." grumbled Angus. "Talk about a recluse. He only comes out once a year and he never catches any flak for it! He probably lives up there in the North Pole to avoid the taxes."

Peering through the binoculars again, he saw Santa board his sleigh shouting "Merry Christmas!" before his reindeer took off into their air, taking Santa into the air to move on to the next town. But when he saw the reindeer fly, Angus realized something.

"Oops. Forgot about the reindeer."

 _NARRATOR: Did that stop old Angus?_ _No._  
 _Angus simply said..._

He jabbed his head towards Slash, knowing that since there weren't any reindeer around for miles, he'll just have to be creative. The dog whined, knowing what he was thinking.

"If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one instead." grinned Angus as he reached a creepy hand out to grab Slash, but the mutt ran away with a scared whimper.

"Oh, Slaaaaaaaaa- _aaaaaaassshhhh!_ " He put on a false innocent voice and called out in sing-songy voice, before he lost patience and his "sweet" tone turned into a angry snarl.

Unfortunately, Slash couldn't hide for long when his master finally caught him and had him pose as a reindeer.

 _So he called his dog, Slash  
and he took some red thread_  
 _and tied a big horn on top_  
 _of his head._

Angus grabbed an antler from his coat rack and some red thread and he quickly tied the antler on top of Slash's head while putting a red clown nose on his nose to look like the famous reindeer we all know and love. He giggled excitedly at his work and put on a director's hat and began to instruct him like a director to an actor to get him into character for a movie.

"Alright, you're a reindeer. Here's your motivation: You're name is Rudolph. You're the freak with the red nose and nobody likes you. But then, one day, Santa picks you and you save Christmas."

Slash looked confused.

"No, forget that part." Angus claimed. "We'll improvise. Just keep it loosey-loosey. You hate Christmas! You're gonna steal it! Saving Christmas is a lousy ending. Way too commercial."

He sat in a director's chair and pulled out a megaphone and shouted, " _Action!_ "

Slash, in responce, popped the red nose of his muzzle. Angus jumped out of the chair with pure joy at this action.

"Brilliant!" shouted he. "You reject you're own nose, because it represents the glimmer of commercialism! Why didn't I think of that?! Alright, cut, check, print! Moving along!"

* * *

 **To Mr crazy movies: I would if I could figure out what to write next.**


	11. Stealing Christmas

The miser hummed to himself after he and Slash hopped aboard his makeshift, mechanical sleigh, switching on buttons, the GPS as well as the engine, making the sleigh vibrate as it sprang to life. It was time set the plan in motion.

"That...feels...good." He replied while the vehicle vibrated and stepped on a petal, increasing the engine.

He laughed and put on the lights on the front of the sleigh, which consisted of floodlights connected to a ladder.

"Here goes nothing, hot dog!" Angus said to Slash and activated the rockets and turbines at the back of the sleigh, that emitted flames. Angus looked back, amazed. "Wow."

Then another lever was pulled and the sleigh elevated, lifting into the air. Angus cheered and laughed, clapping like a child at his birthday. Slash barked out loud, along with him.

"This is nuts!" He yelled insanely. "On, Crasher! On, Thrasher! On, Vomit and Blitzkrieg!"

And with that said, the sleigh blasted off towards Toonville, causing Angus to be yanked backwards from the automobile's intended speed. He scream in terror, hanging onto the wheel as tightly as he could so he wouldn't fall off. Even Slash, fell out of the sleigh, spinning around in the air with the sleigh.

"WE'RE GONNA DIE! WE'RE GONNA DIE! I'M GOING TO THROW UP AND THEN I'M GONNA DIE!" His voice laden with with fear for his life. "MOMMY, TELL IT TO STOP!"

But then Angus finally got the sleigh to hold still as it flew with Slash landing back into his seat next to him. Angus calmed down after that outburst.

"Almost lost my cool back there." He sighed with relief.

And now he steered towards Toonville as the sleigh sputtered as it flew. Every Toon was fast sleep in their beds, dreaming and snoring while they waited for Christmas morning to arrive and the sun to lift up into the sky, for they were excited to be opening gifts by their Christmas trees. But if Angus had anything to say about it as he slowly lowered the sleigh onto one of the house roofs.

 _NARRATOR: All their windows were dark,  
quiet snow filled their air.  
All the Toons were all dreaming  
sweet dreams without care.  
When he came to the first  
little house on the square._

"Welcome to Toonville, Slash!" Angus announced to his canine companion, while sleigh bells jingled and the sleigh stopped right in it's spot.

Inside the house, Ishmael and Yves awoke to the sound of the bells.

"Yves? Yves?" exclaimed Ishmael groggily.

"What?" asked his wife, tiredly with half-open eyes.

"You hear that?" He asked and they both silenced to listen to the familiar sound, to which Yves gasped with surprise.

"It's Santa!" She whispered excitedly. "Go right back to sleep!"

Ishmael nodded and they both laid back down quickly, falling right back in slumberland so that "Santa" won't know they were awake. Angus turned the sleigh off and turned to Slash.

"Come on, Slash. It's our first stop." He explained and grabbed one of the sacks.

 _The old Black Claus hissed  
as he climbed to the roof,_  
 _empty bags in his fist._

 _He's slide down the chimney  
a rather tight pinch.  
But if Santa could do it,  
then so could he with a sinch._

Angus tied a rope around so that when he made it down the chimney, he would be pulled back up easily. Since he didn't exactly have the skills Santa Claus had. He stood up, stiff and tall as he held out his arms like a professional swimmer about to dive into the pool from the high dive as spoke like a sports announcer.

"He's planning a double-twisting interrupted by forward-flying 2-and-a-half with a combo tuck and pike." He said to himself. "High degree of difficulty."

Then he jumped high into the air, performing a twist and then lowered into the opening of the chimney with his arms pointed downward. But once he landed inside, he could only go halfway, since he might've gained a couple pounds from those eating contests from the Toonbilation. Only the top part of him made it though, leaving him stuck.

 _He got stuck only once,_  
 _for a moment or two._

"Blasted water weight!" He hissed. "Goes right to my hips!"

That wasn't going to stop him. He grunted and struggled as he tried to free himself and finally slipped right down into the chimney and stopped at the end of the fireplace, hitting his head on the firewood. The rope left him hanging upside down in the fireplace.

 _Then he stuck his head_  
 _out of the fireplace flue._

Angus shushed the narrator for him to be quiet.

"A little more stealth, please." He requested.

 _(whispering): With the little 'ole  
stocking all hung up in a row._

"These stockings..."

 _He grinned._

"...are the first things to go." He pulled out a jar of moths from inside his coat. "Alright, boys. Chow time."

He opened up the chair, setting the moths free and leaving him to eat away at the fabric of the stockings while he zipped right back up the chimney and open the roof. Angus grabbed the suction tube from his sleigh and tossed it down the chimney then turned it on. The tube sucked in all of the presents, ornaments, decorations and filled up the larger sack on the sleigh while the curmudgeon Santa chuckled to himself.

 _Then he slunk to the icebox._

Afterwards, once the sack had all of the presents, Angus snuck into the kitchen and clung to the refrigerator.

"Slunk?" He repeated mockingly.

He opened wide the door to observe the food inside and the roast beast to be prepared for the feast. He grabbed a plate of Toon-pudding and tossed it behind him, making it smash into pieces.

 _He eyed the Toon's feast.  
He took the Toon-pudding._  
 _He took the roast beast._

After ruining the Toon-pudding, he seized the roast beast and looked underneath his spread legs, acting like a football quarterback.

"Hike!" He screamed and tossed the roasted bird underneath.

He grabbed some more food from the fridge, while eating or drinking some. Meanwhile, his actions were going unheard. At least, not by everyone. Alas, Jack overheard the noise downstairs and when to investigate.

 _He cleaned out that  
icebox as quick as a flash._  
 _Why, Angus, he even took_  
 _their last can of Toon-hash._

 _Then he stuffed all the  
food up the chimney with glee._

"And now..." said Angus cunningly, flicking an ornament on the tree.

 _Grinned Angus._

He grabbed hold of the Christmas tree and lifted it up.

"I will stuff up the tree!" He growled.

 _And Angus grabbed the tree  
and he started to shove  
when he heard a small sound  
like the coo of a dove._

He stopped what he was doing when he heard footsteps coming down the steps. His eyes widened. Someone must've heard him. They're gonna find him stealing all their gifts. Thinking fast, he placed the tree in place and hid behind it. He heard a voice he was all too familiar with.

 _Angus had been caught  
by this tiny Toon son_  
 _who's gotten out of bed_  
 _for a glass of water._

"Santa Claus? Is that you?" He asked. "What are you doing with our tree?"

 _But, you know, Angus_  
 _was so smart and so slick,_  
 _he thought up a lie_  
 _and he thought it up quick._

The fake Santa grinned maliciously as he thought of way to keep Jack from getting suspicious. He brought his arms out from behind the tree while keeping his face hidden.

"Why, my sweet little boy!" chuckled Angus in his best Santa voice.

 _The fake Santa claus lied._

"There's a light on this tree that won't light on one side." He lied, flicking a light. "So I'm taking it back to my workshop, my boy!"

He shook as he chuckled out aloud boisterously and Jack laughed along with him.

"So I'll fix it up there and I'll bring it back here."

"Santa, what's Christmas really about?" asked Jack.

"Vengeance!" hissed Angus, sticking it head out through the tree in full-view at Jack, startling him. But he quickly got back into character. "Uh, I mean, presents, I suppose."

Jack sighed, believing that even Santa Claus was also more intend on the commercialism of Christmas.

"I was afraid of that."

 _And his fib fooled the child._  
 _Then he patted his head_  
 _and got him a drink_  
 _and he sent him to bed._

When Jack was halfway up the steps, he turned to fake the hiding Angus.

"Hey, Santa?"

"What?!" answered back Angus, annoyed and impatient.

"Don't forget Mr. Black." requested the boy.

This took Angus by surprise that he didn't him to be left out on Christmas.

"I know he's mean, hairy and smelly. And his hands may be cold and clammy." Jack explained.

Angus inspected his hands in confusion.

"By I think's he's actually kind of...sweet."

"Sweet?"

Jack nodded. At his words, Angus felt almost touched by the little boy's compliment.

"You think he's sweet?"

"Merry Christmas, Santa." Jack smiled and returned to his room while Angus cringed and covered his ears, trying to shake himself of the pleasant thoughts and the compliment.

 _And when Jack Overland  
went up with his cup,_

"Nice kid." thought Angus. "Bad judge of character."

Once Jack was out of his hair, he instantly grabbed the tree again and ran towards the fireplace, throwing it up the chimney.

 _He went to the chimney  
and stuffed the tree up._

With that finally done, Angus sat in the fireplace and gave the rope a tug which sent him back up the chimney, but his hand came back down, grabbing the firewood, too.

 _And the last thing he took  
was the log for their fire._  
 _On their walls, he left nothing,_  
 _but hooks and some wire._

 _And the one speck of food_  
 _that he had left in the house,_  
 _was a crumb which was even_  
 _too small for a mouse._

There were no more presents or stockings or colorful lights or food or even decorations inside of the house. A mouse scattered across the floor. Angus came back briefly and picked the mouse up by the tail. Angus went from house to house, as crafty as he was maniacal, steal present after present after present, making sure not to leave anything behind.

 _He_ _slithered and slunked  
_ _with a smile most unpleasant,_  
 _around every Toon home and_  
 _he took every present._

From underneath the floor, Angus sawed a circle around one Christmas tree with a chainsaw and let it fall freely down into the hole. Then he popped out.

"Clearance sale. Everything must go."

Using the suction tube on another house, he collected more presents stockings, etc. But then a white cat got sucked up with the rest of the necessities and getting caught in the machinery. Angus looked inside to see what was the matter.

"Oh, what now?" He demanded before he was met with the cat, yowling and clawing at his face with it's claws making him jump to the roof, shaking to get it off.

Then after he fought off the dastardly creature, he arrived at Jessica's house and watched her sleeping peacefully in her bed. He fought back the urge to feel her hair and saw the wedding ring still in it's box. He closed it and swiped it off the nightstand, shooting mocking faces at her and leaving. He cut a hole in the window to another house with his sharpened nails and pulled it out, with his lips still attached to the glass for some reason. Quickly and quietly, he peered inside of Hans's bedroom to see him asleep. He chuckled, but covered his mouth when he heard him mumble in his sleep.

"Jessica, have you ever kissed a man who lost his tonsils twice?" He muttered, sleeping and thinking Jessica entered the room.

"Now, silly." Angus answered with girlish voice to sound like Jessica.

Hans puckered his lips, expecting a smooch. To hell if Angus was going to attempt that, so he picked up Slash who started to whimper.

"But it has been an experience that I always dreamed for." Angus mimicked. "Kiss me, you fool!"

Then Angus made the Mayor kiss "Jessica's lips". Slash's eyes widened and he scampered away, wiping his buttocks on the floor. Hans grinned in his sleep, not knowing in general who or what he just kissed. To add injury to insult, Angus attached a grappling hook to the foot of the bed and took off to proceed with his villainous scheme. More presents were taken from their place under tree before they themselves were taken as well, lights and decorations were pulled down from walls, stocking were removed from fireplaces, even Angus received another face-beating from a cat. Once all the house were cleaned out, Angus added the finishing touch by pulling a light out of place from the big tree at the town center, cutting off the rest of the Christmas lights in town from power. With the everything stolen and placed in his sleight were the big sack was now completely huge and stuffed, Angus started up the sleigh and made it hover, laughing all he while, Unfortunately, because of the extra weight, the sleigh couldn't carry much and it started to malfunction, cutting Angus off from his laughter. The sleigh plummeted back onto the ground. Slash pointed at the gas meter which pointed at empty. He barked, making Angus scowl.

"What are you laughing at, Rudolph?" asked his master with a tempting smirk.


	12. The True Spirit of Christmas

"It's all you, Slash!" Angus shouted.

The morning sun was minutes beyond approaching as Slash was forced to play reindeer, pulling the heavy sleigh up Mt. Everwiffer with Angus shouting him on.

 _NARRATOR: 3,000 feet up,_  
 _up the side of Mt. Everwiffer,_  
 _he road with his load to_  
 _the tiptop to dump it._

They made to the very top of the mountain and made Slash stop when they were close to the cliff and the dog collapsed in the snow, exhausted from carrying all that weight. Angus jumped from the sleigh.

" _WE DID IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!_ " screamed Angus, full of pride and self-confidence, and clapped with enjoyment. "We did it! We did it! That wasn't so bad, was it, Slash?"

Slash gave him a whimper, which he ignored. Angus observed the town from below with an evil smile.

"They'll be waking up now and I know just what they'll do. All the Toons in Toonville will all cry."

* * *

True to his word, once everyone had awaken and found absolutely nothing in their homes, they were despondent and upset. No presents, no lights, no Christmas feast, no decorations, no nothing. It was gone. All gone, because of Angus. How were they going to celebrate Christmas now? The Toons all gathered around the streets of Toonville, wondering what had happened while exclaiming in sadness. Jack joined his family, also sad. Meanwhile, the chief of police rushed to his police car, unaware that the rope with the hook connected to Hans's bed was tied to his car.

"What an embarrassment! I've been robbed!" The Chief claimed and hopped into his car, turning on the sirens and drove off.

Hans opened his eyes with a start. As the Chief drove away, the rope was being pulled and the bed was yanked through the wall, carrying Hans in it. Hans gasped as he was being pulled though the streets with people watching him with naked eyes. The Chief finally stopped the car to look and gasp at seeing their Mayor in his bed in public.

"Mayor Hans?" asked the Chief.

Everyone crowed the Mayor's bed, including Jessica in her fluffy robe covering her nightgown. Hans got out of bed as the Duke helped him into his robe.

"Well, I wonder who could've done this. I can tell you all one thing: Invite Black, destroy Christmas." He then pounded on his bed with his fists, shouting with rage and sorrow, "INVITE BLACK, DESTROY CHRISTMAS!"

"But did anyone listen to me?"

"I did!" cried the Duke, but Hans ignored him.

"No!" Hans sobbed. "You choose to listen to a little not-to-be-taken-seriously boy!"

Jack frowned when the Mayor stared him down with a stern and disappointed glance, blaming him for their predicament.

"Jack, I hope you're very proud of what you have done." scolded Hans.

His words hit him like a brick and was very close to tears. The Mayor waved his finger was ready to leave back to his house. But then Ishmael stepped up.

"If he isn't, I am."

The Toons all gasped at his response and Hans turned to face him in disbelief.

"I'm glad he took our presents." Ishmael smiled at Jack. "Well, I'm glad."

"You hear that? He's glad." said Hans sarcastically who walked up to him. "You're that glad that everything is gone. You're glad that Black virtually wrecked, no, not wrecked, pulverized Christmas. Is that what you're saying?"

"You can't hurt Christmas, Mr. Mayor." Ishmael said in a no-nonsense, speaking the truth. "Because it's not about the gifts or the contests or the fancy lights. That's what Jack has been trying to tell everyone. And me."

Hans was baffled, not believing what he was hearing.

"What is wrong with you? He's a child!"

"He's my child." corrected Ishmael, poking him on the chest. "And he happens to be right, by the way."

For the first time, somebody (his father, no less) was beginning to see the true meaning of Christmas and Jack smiled warmly.

"And I don't need anything more for Christmas and this right here: my family." Ishmael said, hugging his entire family together in a warm embrace. "Merry Christmas, everyone!"

Everyone, excluding Hans, cooed and chattered with agreement. They finally saw what was the most important when it came to the holidays. Sharing, loving, compassion, hope and, of course, bringing the whole family together.

"Merry Christmas, you hunk of burning love!" Yves growled playfully and brought her husband into a fierce kiss, making everyone gasp.

"Give me a break." groaned Hans, rolling his eyes.

The citizens all laughed with happiness, hugging their loved ones and whatnot. Jack, meanwhile, thought back to Angus and looked up at Mt. Everwiffer. He decided to pay him a visit so he send himself down the trash chute and into the dump outside Angus's home.

"Mr. Black?" called Jack. "Mr. Black?"

Angus, however, was getting ready for the final step of his revenge scheme. Dumping everything the Toons had worked for on Christmas down the mountain to be destroyed.

"And now for the final note to my symphony of downright nasty not-niceness! The crescendo of my odious opus!" That said, Angus started to push against the back of his sleigh, grunting with effort. "The wailing and the gnashing of teeth. The bellowing of the bitterly bummed out. It'll be like music to my ears!"

He pushed on the load more and more, until a peculiar sound fell upon his ears. The sound that he wasn't expecting at all. For it was 'boo-hoo'-ing he heard, it was the sound of...singing.

 _Then Angus heard a sound  
rising over the snow._  
 _It started in low,_  
 _then it started to grow._

Angus couldn't believe what he was hearing. As the sound became clearer, he listened closely to hear the Toons singing their hearts out, even though he had swiped every last present from them.

 _But the sound wasn't sad._  
 _Why, the sound sounded merry._  
 _As it was merry._  
 _Very._

 _Every Toon down in Toonville,_  
 _the tall and the small,_  
 _was singing, without_  
 _any presents at all._

The Man in the Snow scowled, having reached his breaking point. After everything he had done just to spite them, to make them cry, to break their Christmas spirit, nothing he would do would stop them from finding a way to make things better. He removed his hat and slid down the rocks, landing in front of his cave, crossing his arms and gritting his teeth.

 _He hadn't stopped Christmas  
from coming. It came._

"Somehow or other, it came just the same!" He roared and Slash whined at his tone.

Jack climbed to the top of the mountain looking for Angus when he found the sleigh stuffed with everything.

"Mr. Black?"

 _And Angus, with his boot-clad_  
 _feet ice-cold in the snow,_  
 _stood puzzling and puzzling._

"How could it be so?" replied Angus, strangling his Santa hat before he turned to Slash. "It came without ribbons! It came without tags! It came without packages, boxes or bags!"

 _And he puzzled and he puzzled,  
until his puzzler was sore._  
 _Then Angus thought of something_  
 _he hadn't before._

As he stood there, staring down at Toonville and scratching his chin, a strange thought peered inside his mind. A thought that he hadn't conjured up in thousands of years.

"Maybe...Christmas..."

 _He thought._

"...dosen't come from a store. Maybe Christmas...perhaps...means a little bit more."

It was right at this very moment that Angus finally realized and understood everything about the joyous Christmas season. Everything he ever thought of it, everything that he had taken for granted. All of these years isolating himself from the Toons and building up rage over the one thing he and the Toons never clearly understood. For Christmas was never about getting or giving cool toys, shopping for good deals and eating roast beast, it was more about the love and spirit. Suddenly, he felt a painful sensation in his chest and jumped back, clutching wear his heart was as if he were having a heart attack. He tried to stand up and walk, but his movement was very weak and he couldn't do more than quiver and convulse. He fell back into the snow, screeching in pain.

"Slash! Help me! I'm feeling!" Angus screamed, earning a strange look from the dog.

As Angus panted, he felt his heart beat faster than it did since ever. It even felt like it was expanding.

 _And what happened then?  
Well, in Toonville they say,_  
 _that Angus's small heart_  
 _grew three sizes that day._

He put a hand to his heart and sat upright. Then he did something that hadn't done in years. He began to sob loudly, feeling sadness from the very first time. He sobbed and wailed like a baby as tears threatened to leak from his eyelids.

"What's happening to me?" He asked and began to watch the morning sun rise up from the clouds, shining it's bright, orange light in all it's glory, making Angus feel...warm.

"I feel toasty inside. And I'm leaking." said he as he wiped the tears from his eyes and turned to his dog. "Oh, Slash."

Slash looked at him.

"I love you!" He laughed and held his arms out. Slash ran to him, jumped into his arms and licked his face. "Okay, that enough! I love you, too. Thank you."

The dog got off of him, then barked when he noticed something off about the sleigh. Angus looked at what he was barking at to see that the sleigh was beginning to give in and slowly slide.

"Oh no! The sleigh, the presents, they'll be destroyed. And I care! What is the deal? WAIT!" The scared Angus rushed up and climbed the mountain as fast as his legs could carry with Slash close behind.

"It shouldn't! It couldn't! It mustn't! It wouldn't!" For once, he didn't care that he was talking in rhyme. "No now, not then, not ever again!"

He made it to the top just in time to see the sleigh was inches away from reaching the edge of the deep cliff so he had to act fast.

"Noooooooooo!" He screamed and jump towards the slipping sleigh, but missed and landed just a foot away from it, but it was moving quick. Angus quickly crawled after it and grabbed onto it. He then laid on his back, trying his very best to stop the sleigh from going any further. He pulled and pulled with all the strength he could muster, but no matter how hard he pulled, the sleigh kept moving.

"Boo-hoo!" He whined, giving up. "Oh, well. It's just toys, right?"

But then he noticed that he and Slash weren't alone. Jack was sitting on the top of the overstuffed sack and looked down at him.

"Hey, Mr. Black!"

Angus gasped at the familiar voice and saw Jack.

"Jack Overland?" He yelled out to him, "What are you doing up there?!"

"I just wanted to be with you." answered Jack. "No one should be alone on Christmas."

Angus was surprised. He actually wanted to be with him, after all he had done? No one had ever wanted to be with him before. Jack smiled at him and Angus smiled back warmly. Sadly, their tender moment was short-lived as the sleigh slipping mighty fast and the front was now hanging over the edge, about ready to fall. Angus panicked, knowing he couldn't stop it. Then Jack's grip on the sack started to weaken and he whimpered, scared out of his wits. But then Angus gasped when he saw his new friend in danger. Jack was going to die along with the toys. This brought determination to Angus's facial features. He was not going to let this innocent boy die. Not like in the post office. Not now or ever. With newfound strength running through his veins, he gave the sleigh a good, strong pull and just like that, the sleigh was brought back and lifted into the air with Angus holding it from the bottom.

"I got you, Jack Overland!"

"You did it!"

Slash barked happily, dancing on his hind legs. Angus felt greater than ever as he held the sleigh up with his bare hands.


	13. The Best Christmas Ever

Angus whooped with joy as the sleigh slid down the trail going down the mountain to return everything to Toonville as Jack sat behind the wheel with Slash and Angus was skiing behind them, hoping onto a rope tied to the back of the sleigh. He was actually having fun for the first time, sliding across the snow on skiis. The sleigh ran up a hill and down again, sending Angus flying in the air.

"Spread eagle!" He shouted, performing said move. "Nailed it."

He laughed hard to his heart's content, but then noticed that the sleigh was about to make a steep turn and when it did, he slid of a rock which acted as a ramp and went soaring through the air, came around the back on the rope and slammed belly-first into the sack before he collapsed onto the control board of the front of sleigh in front of Jack.

"Oh my gosh! Are you alright?" Jack asked with worry.

"Are you kidding?" asked Angus, recovering quickly. "The sun is bright and the powder's bitchin'! Now scoot over! My turn to drive!"

He scooted Jack over and took over the wheel. Angus pulled the wheel back, making the sleigh soar across the air with Jack laughing with excitement and Slash barking before they landed in the snow to continue their way towards Toonville.

"I better slow this buggy down!" said Angus as pulled lever to deploy the brake, which did no help at all.

"We're gonna crash!" shouted Jack, afraid.

"Now you listen to me, little man." Angus scolded. "Even if we're caught in rat trap or horribly mangled, there will be no sad faces on Christmas."

This brought a slight smile to Jack's face which didn't last long for they both saw they were heading directly toward a tree. They both screamed before Angus made a sharp turn, narrowly missing the tree. Everyone in town could see the commotion happening up ahead and heard Jack's terrified screamed. Yves heard this, too, growing more concerned for his son's safety.

"Jack!" She cried.

"Angus?" said Jessica with hope.

"Oh god, my baby!" Yves rushed to grab some Christmas lights to use to slow them down. Jessica quickly rushed to help her, having a change of heart and deciding to help her rival out in spite of everything.

"Jessica, grab an end!" The scared mother ordered.

"By the way, these lights match you're outfit perfectly." complimented Jessica.

The sleigh was approaching fast, which Angus was unable to control.

"Uh oh! This is gonna be difficult to negotiate." He said as they ran through the streets and the Toons all dispersed, clearing a path for them. "Heads up, Toonville!"

"Out of the way! I have no insurance!"

Jessica and Yves got in front of them and pulled on the lights together to try and slow the sleigh down. However, it wasn't strong enough for the sleigh was filled to the brim with all those presents and it wound up dragging the two with it. The Toons scattered in all direction to avoid being run over by the runaway sleigh.

"Run for your lives! Watch out! I can't stop!"

Then with one brave move, Ishmael stood in front of their path with hand out.

"Dad, move!" shouted Jack.

"Dad, move it!" Angus added.

The sleigh ran right into Ishmael's open palm with sent him backwards into the big tree, making the vehicle come to a stop finally.

"Thanks for the assist, Mr. Overland." thanked Angus.

"Hi, Dad!" Jack chirped.

"Hi, Jack, my boy!" Ishmael said back, happy that his son was safe and sound.

"Merry Christmas, one and all!" Angus shouted to the Toons.

Everyone applauded and cheered when they saw he returned their gifts. Jack was reunited with Yves who pulled him into a bear hug. Angus chuckled like Santa Claus before the Chief approached him with hands on hips and starting at him strictly.

"Alright, what do we have here?" He demanded.

"You got me, officer!" Angus hopped down in front of him. "I did it! I did it all! I'm Angus Black who stole Christmas! And I just wanted to say...I'm sorry."

The Toons exclaimed, touched by his apology, though some were skeptical. Angus held his wrists, expecting to be arrested. He knew that what he had done was wrong and that he had to face consequences for it. But for some reason, the Chief didn't cuff him.

"Aren't you cuff me?" asked Angus, confused. "Put me in a choke hold? Or blind me with pepper spray?"

Then Hans arrived at the scene, clearly upset by Angus's actions and wanted to see him get punished for it.

"You heard him, Chief. He admitted it." He said and whispered to him, "I would go with the pepper spray first, if you don't mind."

Angus glared him for that.

"Yeah, I heard him alright. He said he was sorry." The Chief remarked, making Angus grin at the Mayor as if to say 'In your face!'. "Besides, everything's here and accounted for."

"Oh, for Pete's sake! He broke into our houses, stole all our presents, our decorations, our trees! He deserves to be punished!" Hans ranted, but no one was convinced. "Come on, help me out here, people! Jessica!"

He looked around for Jessica before he heard her voice cry, "Merry Christmas, Hans Westergaard!"

They saw that she was on top of the sack.

"I believe I do have something for you." She and slid down the sack, making most people gasp when seeing her bare legs. She panted and held the box with wedding ring out to Hans; therefore, turning down his marriage proposal, which made everyone gasp.

"I'm sorry, but you're just not my type. You're not the one for me. My heart belongs to someone else." She looked directly at Angus.

He looked past him, not sure if she was really was referring to him. He pointed to himself questioningly and she nodded with a smile. He couldn't believe it. After all these years, Jessica still had her heart out to him. The girl who stole his heart actually LOVED him! Angus was so happy that he laughed loudly and did a little happy dance before stepping closer.

"No hard feelings?" asked Angus to Hans with his hand out to him.

He hesitantly shook it, deciding to accept that he and Jessica are better together. Angus laughed boisterously.

"No worries, dude. It's Christmas after all. Which reminds me." He said.

Angus twisted the one light on the big tree which he had messed with earlier and brought light back to the Christmas lights all over town, making everyone gasp in awe and applaud. Angus couldn't help, but grin when he saw Jack before him.

"Merry Christmas, Angus." He said and hugged him tightly and when he released him, he gasped, "You feel so..."

"I know. Cold." Angus sighed.

"No."

"Bumpy? Boney? Do I have acne?"

"No." Jack laughed. "Warm."

Angus smiled at him as Jack grabbed him pale hand.

 _JACK: Fah who for-aze  
Dah who dor-aze  
EVERYONE: Welcome Christmas,  
come this way._

Everyone, including Angus, gathered round in a circle around the big tree and started to sing.

 _Fah who for-aze  
Dah who __for-aze  
Welcome Christmas,  
Christmas Day.  
_

 _Welcome, Welcome,  
fah who rahmus.  
Welcome, Welcome,  
day who dahmus.  
_

 _Christmas Day is  
in our grasp.  
So long as we stand  
hands to clasp.  
_

 _ANGUS: Fah who ray-moo  
ya-who hee haw.  
Welcome, Christmas,  
bring your cheer.  
_

 _Fah who for-aze  
Dah who dor-aze  
Welcome all Toons  
far and near!_

Afterwards, Angus invited everyone to his cave home to celebrate the holiday. For the cave was now brightly decorated with lights, tree, etc. There was even a dinner table where the big feast took place.

 _NARRATOR: So he brought back the toys  
and the food for the feast_  
 _and he, he himself, Angus_  
 _carved the roast beast._

Angus pulled out a knife and fork and began to carve away at the roasted holiday bird while Jessica sat next to him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah!" He grinned, cutting off some meat.

Everyone applauded and clapped with approval. Jack gave a plate of food to Slash, who ate it happily.

"Nothing like the holidays." said Angus. "Who wants the gizzard?"

"I do!"

"Too late! That'll be mine..."

And from that moment on, Angus had finally grown onto the Christmas season. At first, he always had a fear of Santa Claus, but his budding love for Jessica helped him overcome his fear and bring Christmas to his interest. Sadly, it didn't last long when Hans's bullying pushed him too far and made him isolate himself from the Toons and the holiday itself. But everything changed that one year, everything changed for the better. For young Jack Overland helped him open his eyes to what was really important. Angus had learned the biggest lesson of all: love and friendship. Because if that boy cared about him, who angry could he be? Nothing would change from there for Angus, because he knew for a fact that this was, without the shadow of a doubt, the best Christmas he had ever had.

 **THE END**


End file.
